England -- Fiction; Husband and wife -- Fiction; Indiana -- Fiction; Marriage -- Fiction; Mate selection -- Fiction
A deathlike faintness passed over Indiana as she listened to his calm,
passionless voice, pronouncing sentence upon her. She could not, at
that moment, utter a word of pleading or remonstrance. He seemed like a
rock of relentless justice, against which she might hurl herself, only
to be dashed in pieces.
"You see, I have made it very easy for you to drop the shackles of the
tyrant and regain your lost and coveted freedom," he added, bitterly.
She grasped the edge of the table desperately with her small hands. "If
you had only loved me," cried Thurston, despairingly, "it might have
been different! But how could I expect it? You have never been taught
to love—to sacrifice for love. Only to be loved—to demand sacrifices
from others." Gathering all her strength, Indiana moved to the door.
He held it open for her, and she passed him with averted eyes, looking
dazed and hopeless. "Indiana!" he cried, involuntarily, as she
disappeared down the long hall. By a great effort he prevented himself
from rushing after her. Sinking down in a chair, he buried his face in
his hands. He had spoken the final words between them—there was no
retraction now. But so utterly had the serene and smiling little witch
taken possession of his heart, he felt, that in exorcising her he was
plucking it bodily from his breast. Only the necessity of appearing
composed before his mother rescued him from succumbing utterly to his
despair.
Indiana had not heard Thurston’s smothered cry. She climbed the stairs
laboriously, clinging to the banisters. There seemed to be iron weights
hanging to her limbs. But this was the result of lying for so many
hours on the hard floor, in the cold library. Consciousness, too, seemed
fading away from her. She only wished to retain it until she reached
her room; then, she felt, she would be quite satisfied to part with it
forever. Thurston’s last words echoed in her ears, "You have never been
taught to love—to sacrifice for love—only to be loved—to demand
sacrifices from others." That was what Jennings meant when he said that
he looked back with satisfaction on his life, knowing he had served a
loved master faithfully. Even Jennings realized the spirit of love,
while—reaching her bed at last, she pushed back the covers and coiled
herself in its soft depths. Thoughts floated mistily in her brain. "I
have missed many things—to love, to serve, to sacrifice. Perhaps it was
not all my fault—not all." She lapsed into unconsciousness, but it was
the unconsciousness of which nature makes use to soothe exhausted and
tired humanity—sleep.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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