Black humor; Utopian fiction; Utopias -- Fiction; Women -- Fiction
“Danger enough, Terry, and we’ll have to be mighty careful. Women of
that stage of culture are quite able to defend themselves and have no
welcome for unseasonable visitors.”
We talked and talked.
And with all my airs of sociological superiority I was no nearer than
any of them.
It was funny though, in the light of what we did find, those extremely
clear ideas of ours as to what a country of women would be like. It
was no use to tell ourselves and one another that all this was idle
speculation. We were idle and we did speculate, on the ocean voyage and
the river voyage, too.
“Admitting the improbability,” we’d begin solemnly, and then launch out
again.
“They would fight among themselves,” Terry insisted. “Women always do.
We mustn’t look to find any sort of order and organization.”
“You’re dead wrong,” Jeff told him. “It will be like a nunnery under an
abbess--a peaceful, harmonious sisterhood.”
I snorted derision at this idea.
“Nuns, indeed! Your peaceful sisterhoods were all celibate, Jeff, and
under vows of obedience. These are just women, and mothers, and where
there’s motherhood you don’t find sisterhood--not much.”
“No, sir--they’ll scrap,” agreed Terry. “Also we mustn’t look for
inventions and progress; it’ll be awfully primitive.”
“How about that cloth mill?” Jeff suggested.
“Oh, cloth! Women have always been spinsters. But there they
stop--you’ll see.”
We joked Terry about his modest impression that he would be warmly
received, but he held his ground.
“You’ll see,” he insisted. “I’ll get solid with them all--and play one
bunch against another. I’ll get myself elected king in no time--whew!
Solomon will have to take a back seat!”
“Where do we come in on that deal?” I demanded. “Aren’t we Viziers or
anything?”
“Couldn’t risk it,” he asserted solemnly. “You might start a
revolution--probably would. No, you’ll have to be beheaded, or
bowstrung--or whatever the popular method of execution is.”
“You’d have to do it yourself, remember,” grinned Jeff. “No husky black
slaves and mamelukes! And there’d be two of us and only one of you--eh,
Van?”
Jeff’s ideas and Terry’s were so far apart that sometimes it was all
I could do to keep the peace between them. Jeff idealized women in the
best Southern style. He was full of chivalry and sentiment, and all
that. And he was a good boy; he lived up to his ideals.
You might say Terry did, too, if you can call his views about women
anything so polite as ideals. I always liked Terry. He was a man’s man,
very much so, generous and brave and clever; but I don’t think any of
us in college days was quite pleased to have him with our sisters. We
weren’t very stringent, heavens no! But Terry was “the limit.” Later
on--why, of course a man’s life is his own, we held, and asked no
questions.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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