Hildebrand; or, The Days of Queen Elizabeth, An Historic Romance, Vol. 3 of 3Anonymous
History
Hildebrand; or, The Days of Queen Elizabeth, An Historic Romance, Vol. 3 of 3
Anonymous
Great Britain -- History -- Elizabeth, 1558-1603 -- Fiction
Rest? his heart was never to be at rest again! The fearful
visitation which he believed himself to have been subject to, in
the last farewell of his deceased wife, was impressed too vividly
on his mind, and had given too violent a shock to his long-sealed
conscience, to suffer him to rest a moment. What a terrible
retribution had one brief instant brought upon him! In the midst
of his pride, in the height of health, with every pleasure and
enjoyment that riches could purchase within his reach, and with
all the pomp and allurements of the seductive world open to him,
the man who believed himself to be only a creature of the time,
and entirely free from all responsibility, was a prey to the
liveliest pangs and terrors of remorse.
The tremendous mystery of nature was unveiled in his bosom, at
last. In vain did he strive to turn from it; in vain did he
strive to stifle, with the specious sophistries of atheism,
that ever-living and irradicable conviction of responsibility,
which it stamped in the very life-blood of his heart. He might
persuade himself that he believed it to be false; he might say,
as he had often said before, that it was the mere effect of early
impressions; but the awful inspiration rose up still, and, in
spite of all he could think, say, or do, would win and fasten on
his attention.
Whoever has looked close into his own heart, in the silence of
midnight, when its admirable machinery may be best observed,
will have noted how hard it is to fix it on any one thought, and
what a variety of ideas assail us at once. Can he see in this
distraction no trace of supernatural influences? When, in spite
of his very utmost exertion, the thought that he would pursue
is suddenly invaded by another--when the good intention he would
dwell upon becomes associated with corruption--when his virtuous
resolution is overtaken by an allurement to vice, his best and
most generous sympathies, as they are on the very eve of ripening
into effect, stifled by an egregious vanity--does he not, in this
situation, feel that he is of himself like a mariner without a
compass, and that his heart needs a higher and greater Power at
its helm? If he be a reasonable being, such must, beyond all
dispute, be his natural conclusion; and he will feel no less
assured, that that Power is at his hand, and only awaits his
invocation to lend him effectual succour.
Even Shedlock was not abandoned. Nature, bursting the trammels he
had imposed upon her, unfolded herself to his eye in her native
perfectness; conscience sought to arouse him to the truth; but
now, when a last hope was extended to him, he wished to believe
it false; and what should have prostrated him in adoration,
overwhelmed him with horror.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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