Balzac, Honoré de, 1799-1850; Novelists, French -- 19th century -- Biography
How happy he was during those hours of liberty that were never to
return and which he was destined to remember with unparalleled emotion,
in his subsequent inferno of ceaseless toil! He was utterly
irresponsible, he made an orgy out of a melon or a jar of preserves
sent him from Villeparisis, and he decorated his garret with flowers,
which were the gift of Laure, his beloved confidante. He had his dreams
and his hours of exultation, when he listened to the mingled sounds of
Paris, which rose faintly to his dormer window during the beautiful
golden evenings of springtime, evenings that seemed to young and
ambitious hearts so heavy-laden with ardent melancholy and hope; and he
would cry aloud: "I realised today that wealth does not make happiness,
and that the time that I am spending here will be a source of sweet
memories! To live according to my fantasy, to work according to my
taste and convenience, to do nothing at all if I so choose, to build
beautiful air-castles for the future, to think of you and know that you
are happy, to have Rousseau's Julie for my mistress, La Fontaine and
Moliere for my friends, Racine for my master and the cemetery of Pere
Lachaise for my promenade! . . . Oh! if all this could last forever!"
And his twenty years, burning with the fever of vast desires, betray
themselves in a single exclamation: "To be celebrated and to be loved!"
But there were times when he left his garret at nightfall, mingled with
the crowd and there exercised those marvellous faculties of his which
verged upon prodigy. He has described them in a short tale, Facino
Cano, and they appear to have been an exceptional gift. "I lived
frugally," he writes; "I had accepted all the conditions of monastic
life, so essential to those who toil. Even when the weather was fine, I
rarely allowed myself a short walk along the Boulevard Bourdon. One
passion alone drew me away from my studious habits; yet was not this
itself a form of study? I used to go to observe the manners and customs
of suburban Paris, its inhabitants and their characteristics. Being as
ill-clad and as careless of appearances as the labourers themselves, I
was not mistrusted by them, I was able to mingle with groups of them,
to watch them concluding their bargains and quarrelling together at the
hour when they quit their work. In my case, observation had already
become intuitive, it penetrated the soul without neglecting the body,
or rather it grasped so well the exterior details that it straightway
passed above and beyond them; it gave me the faculty of living the life
of the individual on whom it was exerted, by permitting me to
substitute myself for him, just as the dervish in the Thousand and One
Nights took the body and soul of those persons over whom he pronounced
certain words.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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