How Deacon Tubman and Parson Whitney Kept New Year's: And Other StoriesMurray, W. H. H. (William Henry Harrison)
General
How Deacon Tubman and Parson Whitney Kept New Year's: And Other Stories
Murray, W. H. H. (William Henry Harrison)
Fiction; Short stories
I say Deacon Tubman bounced into his trousers, but, to be exact, I
should say that he bounced into half of them; and, with the other half
trailing behind him, he skipped to the window and, putting his little,
plump, round face almost against the pane, gazed out upon the world.
Everything was bright, sparkling and cold, for the earth was covered
with snow and the clear gray of the early morning spread its rayless
illumination over the great dome, in the fading blue of which a few
starry points still gleamed.
"Bless me, what a morning!" he exclaimed. "Beautiful! beautiful!" he
repeated, as he stood with his eyes fastened upon the east and,
balancing himself on one foot, felt around with the other for that half
of the trousers not yet appropriated. "Bless me, what a day," he
ejaculated, as he saved himself by a quick, upward wrench, from falling
from a trip he had inadvertently given himself in an abortive effort to
insert his foot into the unfilled leg of his pantaloons. "Ha, ha, that's
a good un," he exclaimed; "trip yourself up in getting into your own
trousers, will you, Deacon Tubman?" and he laughed long and merrily to
himself over his little joke.
"A happy New Year to everybody," cried the deacon, as he thrust his foot
into his stocking, for the floor of the good man's chamber was
carpetless and so cleanly white that its cleanliness itself was enough
to freeze one. "Yes, a happy New Year to everybody, high, low, rich,
poor, south, north, east and west, where'er they are, the world over, at
home and abroad--Amen!" And the deacon, partly at the sweeping character
of his benediction and partly because he was feeling so jolly inside he
couldn't help it, laughed merrily, as he seized a boot and thrust his
foot vigorously into it.
"What's this? what's this?" cried the deacon, as he tugged away at the
straps until he was red in the face. "This boot never went on hard
before. What's the matter with the pesky thing?" And he arose from his
chair, and, standing on one foot, turned and twisted about, tugging all
the while at the straps.
"Bless my soul!" exclaimed the deacon, disgusted with its strange
behavior, "what is the matter with the pesky boot?"
[Illustration: "_What's the matter with the pesky thing?_"]
Then he sat down upon the chair again, wrenched his foot out of the
offending article and held it up between both hands in front of him and
shook it violently, when, with a bump and a bound, out rattled a package
upon the floor and rolled half way across the room. The deacon was after
it in a jiffy and, seizing it in his little fat hands, held it up
before his eyes and read: "A New Year's gift from Miranda."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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