How to be Happy Though Married: Being a Handbook to MarriageHardy, E. J. (Edward John)
General
How to be Happy Though Married: Being a Handbook to Marriage
Hardy, E. J. (Edward John)
Marriage
We do not endorse the exaggerated statement of Richter that "no man can
live piously or die righteously without a wife," but we think that the
chances of his doing so are considerably lessened. It is not good for a
man to live alone with his evil thoughts. The checks and active duties
of marriage are the best antidote, not only to an impure life, but to
the dreaming and droning of a useless and purposeless one.
Certainly there are some men and women who without wives or husbands are
marriage-made in the sense of having their love and powers drawn out by
interesting work. They are married to some art or utility, or instead of
loving one they love all. When this last is the case they go down into
the haunts of evil, seek out the wretched, and spare neither themselves
nor their money in their Christ-like enthusiasm for humanity. But the
luxury of doing good is by no means confined to the celibate. On the
contrary, the man with a wife and children in whose goodness and
happiness he rejoices may be much better prepared to aid and sympathize
with the erring and the suffering. The flood-gates of his affections may
have been opened, and he may have become receptive to influences which
had upon him beforetime little or no effect.
Not a few good and great men have confessed that they were marriage-made
to a very considerable extent. The following testimony was given by De
Tocqueville in a letter to a friend: "I cannot describe to you the
happiness yielded in the long run by the habitual society of a woman, in
whose soul all that is good in your own is reflected naturally, and even
improved. When I say or do a thing which seems to me to be perfectly
right, I read immediately in Marie's countenance an expression of proud
satisfaction which elevates me; and so when my conscience reproaches me
her face instantly clouds over. Although I have great power over her
mind, I see with pleasure that she awes me; and so long as I love her as
I do now I am sure that I shall never allow myself to be drawn into
anything that is wrong."
Many a man has been shown the pathway to heaven by his wife's practice
of piety. "My mercy," says Bunyan, "was to light upon a wife whose
father and mother were accounted godly. This woman and I, though we came
together as poor as poor might be (not having so much household stuff as
a dish or a spoon betwixt us both), yet she had for her part 'The Plain
Man's Pathway to Heaven' and 'The Practice of Piety,' which her father
had left her when he died." By reading these and other good books,
helped by the kindly influence of his wife, Bunyan was gradually
reclaimed from his evil ways, and led gently into the way of
righteousness.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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