For, as some late philosophers. Have well observ'd, beasts, that converse 790 With man, take after him, as hogs Get pigs all the year, and bitches dogs. Just so, by our example, cattle Learn to give one another battle. We read, in NERO's time, the heathen, 795 When they destroy'd the Christian brethren, Did sew them in the skins of bears, And then set dogs about their ears: From thence, no doubt, th' invention came Of this lewd antichristian game. 800 To this, quoth RALPHO, Verily The point seems very plain to me. It is an antichristian game, Unlawful both in thing and name. First, for the name: the word, bear-baiting 805 Is carnal, and of man's creating: For certainly there's no such word In all the scripture on record; Therefore unlawful, and a sin; And so is (secondly) the thing. 810 A vile assembly 'tis, that can No more be prov'd by scripture than Provincial, classic, national; Mere human-creature cobwebs all. Thirdly, it is idolatrous; 815 For when men run a whoring thus With their inventions, whatsoe'er The thing be, whether dog or bear, It is idolatrous and pagan, No less than worshipping of DAGON. 820 Quoth HUDIBRAS, I smell a rat; RALPHO, thou dost prevaricate: For though the thesis which thou lay'st Be true ad amussim, as thou say'st; (For that bear-baiting should appear 825 Jure divino lawfuller Than synods are, thou dost deny, Totidem verbis; so do I;) Yet there's a fallacy in this; For if by sly HOMAEOSIS, 830 Tussis pro crepitu, an art Under a cough to slur a f--t Thou wou'dst sophistically imply, Both are unlawful, I deny. And I (quoth RALPHO) do not doubt 835 But bear-baiting may be made out, In gospel-times, as lawful as is Provincial or parochial classis; And that both are so near of kin, And like in all, as well as sin, 840 That put them in a bag, and shake 'em, Yourself o' th' sudden would mistake 'em, And not know which is which, unless You measure by their wickedness: For 'tis not hard t'imagine whether 845 O' th' two is worst; tho' I name neither.