In the old tribal civilization which prevailed, the idea of marriage
was ill-defined, and it was only as the desire for the ownership of
children grew that moral ideas in this relation became at all definite.
The fact that men wished to leave to their children property and
chattels, which they might not have the opportunity of disposing of
satisfactorily before their death, brought about a desire for marriage
upon the monogamous and monandrous basis; and the fact that man was
the owner of the property, and that the wife, until recently, had
no inherent right therein, made the matter of the ownership of the
children of primal importance, so that the wishes of the father in
regard to the inheritance might be fulfilled. It was on account of the
supremacy of man in his own home that the family became the unit upon
which the State is built, just as the male individual was the unit upon
which the family was built, and citizenship was primarily evolved and
applicable only to the male portion of the population, inasmuch as they
were necessary to the State both as tax-payers and as warriors. This
idea of the ownership of children enforced upon woman the moral code
under which she lives in Occidental countries to-day; and, at the same
time, and for the reasons above stated, kept man immune from it.
The significance attached to the sexual desire in this relationship
is and has been greatly overestimated, to the greatest disadvantage
of mankind at large. The most distinguishing feature about connubial
affection as compared with Platonic friendship, is that in matrimony
there is the added unification of the parties thereto, owing to the
community of interest between them. Their individualities are merged
into one another; their development must be along similar or parallel
lines. Richter has given us a good account of what a man should select
in the character of his wife "to whom he may be able to give readings
concerning the more essential principles of psychology and astronomy
without her bringing up the subject of his stockings in the middle of
his loftiest and fullest flights of enthusiasm; yet he will be well
content should one possessed of moderate excellencies fall to his
lot--one who shall be capable of accompanying him, side by side, in
his flights so far as they extend--whose eyes and heart may be able to
take in the blooming earth and the shining heavens, in great, grand
masses at a time, and not in mere infinitesimal particles; one for whom
this universe may be something higher than a nursery or ball-room, and
one who, with feelings delicate and tender, both pious and wide, will
be continually making her husband better and holier." Since the time
of Jean Paul Richter, woman has been allowed educational advantages
more nearly equal to those of her brothers than heretofore; and, as a
consequence, in many instances and quite often, do we find the lady not
only the better but the larger half of the home, intellectually.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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