Humoresque: A Laugh on Life with a Tear Behind It — John Shaqi
Humoresque: A Laugh on Life with a Tear Behind ItHurst, Fannie
General
Humoresque: A Laugh on Life with a Tear Behind It
Hurst, Fannie
Fiction; Short stories, American
"I--it's just that I got cold, honey, sitting here waiting--the surprise
and all. Run, honey, and get me a drink. Crack some ice, dearie, and
then run up-stairs in the third floor back and see if there's some
brandy up there. Be sure to look for--the brandy. I--I'll be all right."
"My poor, darling, cold mommie!"
She was off on the slim, quick feet, the screen door slamming and
vibrating.
Then Mrs. Goldstone sprang up.
"You wouldn't dare! Such a baby--you wouldn't dare!"
"Dare what?"
"You can't have the child! You can't!"
"What do you mean?"
"What do I mean?"
He advanced a step, his voice and expression lifted in incredulity.
"Say, look here, Becker, are you stark, raving crazy? Is it possible you
don't know that, in your place, nobody but a crazy woman would open
her mouth?"
"Maybe; but I don't care. Just leave her alone, Kess, please! That
little baby can stand nothing but happiness."
"Why, woman, you're crazy with the heat. If you want to know it, I'm
nuts over that little kid. Gad! never ran across anything so full of zip
in my life! I'm going to make life one joy ride after another for that
joy baby. That kid's the showpiece of the world. She's got me so hipped
I'm crazy, and the worst of it is I like it. You don't need to worry. As
the boys say, when I settle down, I'm going to settle hard."
"You ain't fit to have her!"
"Say, the kind of life I've lived I ain't ashamed to tell her own
father. He's a man, and I'm a man, and life's life."
"You--"
"Now look here, Becker. That'll be about all. If you're in your right
senses, you're going to ring the joy bells louder than any one around
here. What you got on your chest you can just as well cut your throat as
tell; so we'll both live happy ever after. There's not one thing in my
life that any jury wouldn't pass, and--"
"I've seen you drunk."
"Well, what of it? It took three of us to yank old I.W. out from under
the table at my sister's wedding."
"You--What about you and Cissie and--"
The light run of feet, and almost instantly Miss Goldstone was
pirouetting in between them.
"Here, dearie! There wasn't anything like brandy up in the third floor.
I found some cordial in the pantry. Drink it down, dearie; it'll
warm you."
They hovered together, Miss Goldstone trembling between solicitude and
her state of intensity.
"Kessie darling, you've got to go now. I want to get mommie up-stairs to
bed. You got to go, darling, until to-morrow. Oh, why isn't it tomorrow?
I want everybody to know. Don't let on, Mamma Hat. I'll pop it on popsie
at breakfast while I'm opening his eggs for him. You come for breakfast,
Leon. You're in the family now." He lifted her bodily from her feet,
pressing a necklace of kisses round her throat.
"Good night, Twinkle-pinkle, till to-morrow."
"Good night, darling. I won't sleep a wink, waiting for you."
"Me, neither."
"One more, darling--a French one."
"Two for good measure."
"Sleep tight, beautiful! Good night!"
"Good night, beautifulest!"
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
Reviews
Reviews
No reviews yet
Be the first to share your thoughts on this work.
Join the Discussion
Join the discussion
Sign in to leave a comment or review.
Sign InorCreate an account