[Illustration: _Enthusiastic Briton_ (_to seedy American, who has been running down all our National Monuments_). “But even if our Houses of Parliament ‘aren’t in it,’ as you say, with the Masonic Temple of Chicago, surely, Sir, you will admit the Thames Embankment, for instance----” _Seedy American_. “Waal, _guess_ I don’t think so durned much of your Thames Embankment, neither. It _rained_ all the blarmed time the night I _slep_ on it.”] [Illustration: “Gentlemen, I am ready to admit that his Career in the Past has not been free from Blemish----”] [Illustration: FASHIONABLE AND SEASONABLE. Where to Sup _al fresco_ in the Hottest Weather. The “_Whelkome_ Club.”] [Illustration: “Tell your Fortune, Pretty Gentleman?”] [Illustration: _Clerk of Booking-Office._ “There is _no_ First Class by this Train, Sir.” ’_Arry_. “Then wot are _we_ going ter do, Bill?”] [Illustration: “THE ANCHOR’S WEIGHED.” (_Sketched on an Excursion Steamer._)] [Illustration: SOCIAL EVOLUTION _Tramp_ (_to benevolent but inquisitive Lady_). “Well you see, Mum, it were like this. I were a ’Addick Smoker by profession; then I got ill, and ’ad to go to the ’Orspital; then I sold Cats’ Meat; but some’ow or other I got into _low water!_”] [Illustration: A SKETCH NEAR PICCADILLY.] [Illustration: THE MOTOR ’BUS. _Fussy Old Gent_. “Hi! Stop! stop! I want to get down.” _Driver_. “_I_ can’t stop the bloomin’ thing!!”] [Illustration: “Poor likkle Doggie--hasn’t got any Fevvers on!”] [Illustration: THE MOTOR ’BUS. _Fussy Old Gent_. “Hi! Stop! stop! I want to get down.” _Driver_. “I can’t stop the bloomin’ thing!!”] [Illustration: SO VERY CONSIDERATE. _Stout Coster_. “Where are yer goin’ to, Bill?” _Bill_. “Inter the Country for a nice Drive, bein’ Bank ’Olidy.” _Stout Coster_. “Same ’ere. I sy! don’t yer think we might swop Misseses just for a few Hours? It would be so much kinder to the Hanimile!”] [Illustration: _Sexton_ (_to a Divine, who was spending his holidays in the country, and who, on the sudden illness of the Village Parson, volunteered to take the duties_). “A worse Preacher would have done for us, Sir, _but we couldn’t get one_!”] [Illustration: ZOOLOGY. “That’s a Porkypine, Sarah.” “No, it ain’t, Bill. It’s a Orstridge!”] [Illustration: SONGS AND THEIR SINGERS.] [Illustration: 79 SONGS AND THEIR SINGERS.] [Illustration: SONGS AND THEIR SINGERS. “Oh, rest you merry Gentleman, May nothing you dismay!”] [Illustration: “A STUDY IN EXPRESSION.”] End of Project Gutenberg's Humorists of the Pencil: Phil May, by Phil May