English literature -- Early modern, 1500-1700; English wit and humor; Great Britain -- Civilization -- 17th century -- Literary collections
A horse then was sadled with speed,
and boots and Spurs she put on,
And other materials most fit,
because she would not be known;
A horse-back she straight got astride,
with a Hogs-Pudding in her hand,
And meeting these Taylors in haste,
she presently bid them to stand.
_O this &c_
Deliver your Money (quoth she)
or else your manhoods now try,
Or by this same thing in my hand,
every man of you shall dye;
Then out her Black-Pudding she pull'd,
which sore did the Taylors affright,
They thought it had been a Pistol well charg'd,
because 'twas late in the night.
_O this &c._
They beg'd their lives she might save,
we are but poor Taylors (quoth they)
And truly no money we have,
for we work but for four pence a day;
You lye, like all Rogues (quoth she)
and do not my patience provoke,
For 5 pounds you have tane for your work,
so presant that word did them choak.
_O this &c._.
That money deliver with speed,
if that you think well on your lives,
Or by this same thing you shall bleed,
the which will go farther than knives;
Then out of their pockets their money they took,
with many a sorrowful tear,
And gave it into her hand,
here's all on't each Taylor did swear.
_O this &c._--
And when she their money had got,
she set Spurs and away she did run,
The Devil go with you (quoth they)
for i'me sure that we are undone;
But when that this Cook-maid came home,
strait unto her Master she told,
And show'd him his money again,
how passages went she did unfold.
_O this &c._
[Illustration: The poor Taylor making his complaint to the Esquire]
But here comes the cream of the jest,
those Taylors which was such Men,
After they'd stood pausing awhile,
then back they returned again;
They came with a pittiful tone,
their hair stood like men bewitcht,
To th' Gentleman they made their moan,
for their mony their fingers it itcht.
_O this &c._
The Gentleman laugh'd in conceit,
how many was there said he,
Sure you were all men sufficient
to a beaten above two or three;
Truly we saw but one man,
the which took our Money away,
But we feared he had partakers in store,
or else he should never a carried the day.
_O this &c._
He was well mounted upon a good steed,
and a Pistol that put us to studying,
You lye like all fools (quoth she)
it was but a black Hogs-Pudding;
Thus they the poor Taylors did jeer,
and the Cook-maid laugh'd in conceit,
That with nothing but a black Pudding,
and that five Taylors did beat.
_O this &c._.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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