Lesbians -- Fiction; Love stories; New York (N.Y.) -- Fiction
He was looking at her. Looking straight at her, as if he had been
following her through the crowd with his eyes, not quite sure but
wondering. For a split second Laura didn’t believe it; thought he didn’t
really see her and was just looking that way. But then he cried,
“Laura!” in his big rough voice, and her eyes went huge with fear and
she gasped and turned and ran as if the devil were after her. She ran
headlong, panicky, her heart huge and desperate, struggling to get out
of her throat. She ran with all her strength and with an unreasoning
terror whipping her heels, all the way to the subway. She never once
looked back. People turned to stare, they jumped out of the way and she
collided with a dozen of them. She almost fell down the subway steps and
ran and dodged and shoved her way into the ladies’ rest room.
There, she fell on the floor, whimpering, crying despairingly, unable to
lift herself off the filth of the black floor and completely unaware of
anything but the hysterical fear that gripped her. After a while she
felt hands on her shoulders and she gave a wild scream and sat up. A
terrified Negress was bending over her, saying, “There now, there now.”
Her eyes were all whites.
Laura panted, speechless, gasping for breath. She leaned exhausted
against the door of a booth until her wind came back to her and then she
tried to get up. The Negro woman helped her, handling her like heirloom
china, watching her every second for fear she would take off on another
fit.
Laura half staggered to the wash basin and turned the water on. She
looked at her haggard face in the mirror and an attack of real crying,
soothing relief with real tears, overwhelmed her. “Father, Father,
Father,” she cried softly, her face in her hands.
“Can I help you, Miss?” the colored woman asked. She was scared by
Laura’s behavior, but fascinated.
Laura shook her head.
After a moment’s pause the woman said, “You came in here like a bat out
of hell. You was out of your mind, honey, that’s for sure. Was some
sonofabitch chasin’ you?”
Laura put her hands down to look at the woman in the cracked mirror over
the basin. She nodded.
“Well, I never seen a girl so scared in my life. Never.” She shook her
head positively. “You better get yourself some help, honey. Is he still
out there?”
At this Laura went so white that she frightened the woman again, who
said, “There now, there now. Didn’t mean to start nothin’. Don’t go off
like that again.”
Laura turned around to look at her. And in her awful unhappiness she
went to her and put her arms around her, to the bottomless astonishment
of the woman, and wept on her shoulder. “I never had a mother,” Laura
sobbed. “I never had a mother.” And her heart was broken.
The woman held her like a child and said, “There now, there now.
Everybody’s got a mother, even you.”
“Nobody knows me. I don’t even know myself. I don’t know what I’m doing
here,” she said brokenly. “I’m a stranger in this world.”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
Reviews
Reviews
No reviews yet
Be the first to share your thoughts on this work.
Elsewhere in the archive
Join the Discussion
Join the discussion
Sign in to leave a comment or review.
Sign InorCreate an account