"I'll Leave It To You": A Light Comedy In Three ActsCoward, Noël
General
"I'll Leave It To You": A Light Comedy In Three Acts
Coward, Noël
Comedy plays; Inheritance and succession -- Drama
_The_ SCENE _is the same as Act I. Eighteen months have elapsed.
All the windows are wide open. It is a glorious summer day.
Alterations in the furniture are noted at the end of the play. At
the table_ L. EVANGELINE _is seated when the_ CURTAIN _rises,
typewriting slowly but firmly. There are a lot of papers strewn
about. On the piano there is a sort of a pastry board to which is
affixed a working model of a motor engine in miniature._ JOYCE _is
seated at table_ L.C. _laboriously copying out a sheet of music on
to some manuscript paper._
JOYCE (_showing music_). Is it a crotchet or a quaver that has a waggle
on the end of it?
EVANGELINE. I haven't the remotest idea.
JOYCE. I do think Bobbie might write them a little more distinctly, it's
awfully difficult to copy.
(JOYCE _hums._)
EVANGELINE. I don't wish to appear surly or disagreeable to my younger
sister, but if you don't stop squawking I shall hurl something at you.
JOYCE. Oh, all right. (_She hums louder._)
EVANGELINE (_after a short pause_). Joyce, you really are maddening; you
know perfectly well that I have to revise and retype an entire short
story which in itself is a nerve-racking job, and all you do is to
burble and sing, and gabble. Can't you be quiet?
JOYCE. Why don't you go and work in your own room?
EVANGELINE. Because it would be neither comfortable or proper with three
inquisitive painters there, running up and down the kitchen steps.
JOYCE. Oh, I'd forgotten.
(JOYCE _hums again._)
EVANGELINE. But if you desire to continue your noises, may I suggest
that you do your music in the summer house. There's a nice firm table
there.
JOYCE. No thanks, I'm quite comfy here.
EVANGELINE. Well, I'm sorry to hear it.
(_Enter_ MRS. DERMOTT _from hall. Goes to table and tidies papers._)
MRS. DERMOTT. Vangy dear, I _do_ think you might have made the hall look
a little tidier. We shall have Mrs. Crombie and Faith here soon. It
really is tiresome of Bobbie to have made me ask them, specially as
Uncle Daniel's coming too. They'll be terribly in the way and we shall
have to make conversation instead of listening to Uncle Daniel's
thrilling stories. (_Goes to Chesterfield and tidies papers._)
EVANGELINE. I can't think why you didn't wire and put them off
yesterday.
MRS. DERMOTT. Because Bobbie would have been miserable and sulky.
EVANGELINE. He's very inconsiderate. I don't think you ought to give in
to him so much, mother; it only makes him worse. What he can see in that
tiresome little cat beats me.
JOYCE. She's awfully pretty.
(MRS. DERMOTT _merely takes papers from one place to another, frequently
dropping some, as she is "tidying up."_)
EVANGELINE. And entirely brainless.
JOYCE. Well, we can be thankful that Mrs. Crombie isn't staying over the
week-end. One day of her is bad enough.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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