"In what way?" I asked, forcing a smile.
"Archie was horrid, and you, Jeff----"
Yes, I remembered that hostility to Archie certainly had resulted in a
_rapprochement_ between ourselves.
"Well," she said at last, lifting her face, "good-night, dearest--I know
who _I_ shall dream of!"
I kissed her, heard the sound of her key in the lock, and, turning, saw
her little face still looking through the half-closed door after me. I
returned to King's Cross by way of Woburn Place, but there was only a
glimmer of light within the fanlight of Evie's dwelling as I passed.
Perhaps Archie had chosen the whisky and soda after all.
I soon saw that only by means of a studied unemotionalness should I be
able for long to head her off from the things she sought; and I set
about the creation of this atmosphere without loss of time. In this I
found my far-reaching ambition useful to me; I had simply to be
preoccupied with business to be spared much. I had not to play this
part. I actually was a ferment of new plans. That my absorbing ambition
was all for her sake was allowed to pass as understood. And when she
began to make touching attempts to be interested in my affairs, I, lest
a worse thing should befall me, encouraged her. I talked fully and
freely, knowing that I ran no more risk of betrayal than Napoleon did
when he laid before a Russian peasant woman unacquainted with French the
plan of campaign he feared to trust to his own staff. This I did as the
almonds pushed forth their pink, and the plane-trees budded, and the
building birds sang loudly. Once she called me her building bird.
I had had to tell her, vaguely, about my employment; and I was also
vague about where I lived. Here her own tempted timorousness helped me.
It was not difficult for me to be stern about the proprieties, and
indeed, as she saw this, and began to feel perfectly safe with me, she
even affected a liberality of thought. "Why not?" she would sometimes
ask almost defiantly; "why not see one another in our own places--if
there was nothing horrid?"
And for that I usually found a surprised stare answer enough.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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