After sixteen kittens, that is to say after one fortnight, for there
were three kittens on the first day to impress the fact of the Sending,
the whole camp was uplifted by a letter—it came flying through a
window—from the Old Man of the Mountains—the Head of all the
Creed—explaining the Manifestation in the most beautiful language and
soaking up all the credit for it himself. The Englishman, said the
letter, was not there at all. He was a backslider without Power or
Asceticism, who couldn’t even raise a table by force of volition, much
less project an army of kittens through space. The entire arrangement,
said the letter, was strictly orthodox, worked and sanctioned by the
highest authorities within the pale of the Creed. There was great joy at
this, for some of the weaker brethren seeing, that an outsider who had
been working on independent lines could create kittens, whereas their
own rulers had never gone beyond crockery—and broken at best—were
showing a desire to break line on their own trail. In fact, there was
the promise of a schism. A second Round Robin was drafted to the
Englishman, beginning: “O Scoffer,” and ending with a selection of
curses from the Rites of Mizraim and Memphis and the Commination of
Jugana, who was a “fifth rounder” upon whose name an upstart
“third-rounder” once traded. A papal excommunication is a _billet-doux_
compared to the Commination of Jugana. The Englishman had been proved,
under the hand and seal of the Old Man of the Mountains, to have
appropriated Virtue and pretended to have Power which, in reality,
belonged only to the Supreme Head. Naturally the Round Robin did not
spare him.
He handed the letter to Dana Da to translate into decent English. The
effect on Dana Da was curious. At first he was furiously angry, and then
he laughed for five minutes.
“I had thought,” he said, “that they would have come to me. In another
week I would have shown that I sent the Sending, and they would have
dis-crowned the Old Man of the Mountains who has sent this Sending of
mine. Do you do nothing. The time has come for me to act. Write as I
dictate, and I will put them to shame. But give me ten more rupees.”
At Dana Da’s dictation the Englishman wrote nothing less than a formal
challenge to the Old Man of the Mountains. It wound up: “And if this
Manifestation be from your hand, then let it go forward; but if it be
from my hand, I will that the Sending shall cease in two days’ time. On
that day there shall be twelve kittens and thenceforward none at all.
The people shall judge between us.” This was signed by Dana Da, who
added pentacles and pentagrams, and a _crux ansata_, and half a dozen
_swastikas_, and a Triple Tau to his name, just to show that he was all
he laid claim to be.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
Reviews
Reviews
No reviews yet
Be the first to share your thoughts on this work.
Elsewhere in the archive
Join the Discussion
Join the discussion
Sign in to leave a comment or review.
Sign InorCreate an account