Nevertheless, the creative instinct was too powerful in him to let his
depression at the interference of this eternal waverer affect him long,
or sap his strength. In the very midst of his upbraiding, after he had
angrily thrown the first sheet into a corner, he took a second frame of
card-board, and began to sketch the scene where the homeless beauty,
with her naked boy, is standing at the gate of the convent, surrounded
by the staring nuns, whose looks and attitudes express doubt and
suspicion. Felix threw himself on his couch again, and lay smoking,
rarely throwing in a word, as he watched every movement of the other's
hand. The proximity of this man, who was self-reliant, so humble, and
yet so constantly striving at some lofty aim, exercised a singularly
soothing influence upon Felix's restless soul. He confessed this, when
Kohle began to express surprise that any one should leave the town,
head over heels in this way, and rush into the country, in order, when
he arrived there, to shut himself up in a sunless garret room, and look
on while a man painfully trundled his barrow over a hard road, toward a
goal of art which is generally supposed to have long since been left
behind.
"My dear Kohle," he said, "only let me stay here. I should like very
much to learn something from you which would be of more benefit to me
than a walk or a bath in the lake--namely, your art of knowing just
what you want, and of wanting nothing which you cannot have. Was this
art born in you, or have you gradually acquired it, and paid your
instruction-fee for it, as for other arts?'
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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