Egypt -- Description and travel -- Humor; London (England) -- Description and travel -- Humor; Voyages and travels -- Humor
After Mr. Peasley had been conducted to his room he dug up his Baedeker
and very carefully read the introduction to Brussels. Then he studied
the map for a little while. He believed in getting a good general idea
of the lay of things before he tackled a new town. He marked on the
map a few of the show places which seemed worth while, and then he
sallied out, waving aside the smirking guide who attempted to fawn upon
him as he paused at the main entrance. Mr. Peasley would have nothing
to do with guides. He always said that the man who had to be led
around by the halter would do better to stay right at home.
It was a very busy afternoon for Mr. Peasley. At first he had some
difficulty in finding the places that were marked in red spots on the
map. This was because he had been holding the map upside down. By
turning the map the other way and making due allowance for the
inaccuracies to be expected in a book written by ignorant foreigners,
the whole ground plan of the city straightened itself out, and he
boldly went his way. He visited an old cathedral and two art
galleries, reading long and scholarly comments on the more celebrated
masterpieces. Some of the paintings were not properly labelled, but he
knew that slipshod methods prevailed in Europe--that a civilisation
which is on the downhill and about to play out cannot be expected to
breed a business-like accuracy. He wrote marginal corrections in his
guide book and doctored up the map a little, several streets having
been omitted, and returned to the hotel at dusk feeling very well
repaid. From the beginning of his tour he had maintained that when a
man goes out and gets information or impressions of his own unaided
efforts he gets something that will abide with him and become a part of
his intellectual and artistic fibre. That which is ladled into him by
a verbose guide soon evaporates or oozes away.
At the _table d'hote_ Mr. Peasley had the good fortune to be seated
next to an Englishman, to whom he addressed himself. The Englishman
was not very communicative, but Mr. Peasley persevered. It was his
theory that when one is travelling and meets a fellow Caucasian who is
shy or reticent or suspicious the thing to do is to keep on talking to
him until he feels quite at ease and the _entente cordiale_ is fully
established. So Mr. Peasley told the Englishman all about Iowa and
said that it was "God's country." The Englishman fully agreed with
him--that is, if silence gives consent. There was a lull in the
conversation and Mr. Peasley, seeking to give it a new turn, said to
his neighbour, "I like this town best of any I've seen. Is this your
first visit to Brussels?"
"I have never been to Brussels," replied the Englishman.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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