"I do know something about you, Mr. McKay," she said. "Among other
things I know that--that if you have become--become intemperate--it
is not your fault.... That was vile of them-unutterably wicked-to do
what they did to you--"
"Who are you?" he burst out. "Where have you learned-heard such
things? Did I babble all this?"
"You did not utter a sound!"
"Then--in God's name--"
"Oh, yes, yes!" she murmured, "in God's name. That is why you and I
are here together--in God's name and by His grace. Do you know He
wrought a miracle for you and me--here in New York, in these last
hours of this dreadful year that is dying very fast now?
"Do you know what that miracle is? Yes, it's partly the fact that
you did not die last night out there on the street. Thirteen degrees
below zero! ... And you did not die.... And the other part of the
miracle is that I of all people in the world should have found
you!... That is our miracle."
Somehow he divined that the girl did not mean the mere saving of his
life had been part of this miracle. But she had meant that, too,
without realising she meant it.
"Who are you?" he asked very quietly.
"I'll tell you: I am Evelyn Erith, a volunteer in the C. E. D.
Service of the United States."
He drew a deep breath, sank down on his elbow, and rested his head
on the pillow.
"Still I don't see how you know," he said. "I mean--the beastly
details--"
"I'll tell you some time. I read the history of your case in an
intercepted cipher letter. Before the German agent here had received
and decoded it he was arrested by an agent of another Service. If
there is anything more to be learned from him it will be extracted.
"But of all men on earth you are the one man I wanted to find. There
is the miracle: I found you! Even now I can scarcely force myself to
believe it is really you."
The faintest flicker touched his eyes.
"What did you want of me?" he inquired.
"Help."
"Help? From such a man as I? What sort of help do you expect from a
drunkard?"
"Every sort. All you can give. All you can give."
He looked at her wearily; his face had become pallid again; the dark
hollows of dissipation showed like bruises.
"I don't understand," he said. "I'm no good, you know that. I'm done
in, finished. I couldn't help you with your work if I wanted to.
There's nothing left of me. I am not to be depended on."
And suddenly, in his eyes of a boy, his self-hatred was revealed to
her in one savage gleam.
"No good," he muttered feverishly, "not to be trusted--no will-power
left.... It was in me, I suppose, to become the drunkard I am--"
"You are NOT!" cried the girl fiercely. "Don't say it!"
"Why not? I am!"
"You can fight your way free!" His laugh frightened her.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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