But he would go on to Schönstein all the same, whither the two ladies
had also consented to go. He did not deceive himself when he submitted
to his own conscience this theory. He knew there was no danger of his
disturbing Miss Brunel’s peace of mind, and he knew that Dove would have
no further injustice done her. It was he who was to suffer. His
thoughtlessness had permitted the growth of a hopeless passion: it would
never be known to her who had inspired it, nor to her whom it had
dispossessed. He only should carry about with him the scourge; and he
was not without a hope that time and travel would for once accommodate
themselves to an absurd superstition, and cure him of an unfortunate
love.
For the rest, he was almost glad that he had mentally kissed
Schön-Rohtraut’s mouth. The consciousness of this passionate and
hopeless attachment was in itself a pure and elevated feeling—a maiden
delight which had no earthly element mixed with it. It was so different
from the kindly, affectionate interest he took in Dove—so different from
that familiar liking which made him think nothing of kissing the young
girl in an easy fraternal way. To think of kissing Annie Brunel! The
page could only look wonderingly and longingly at his beautiful
mistress, at her pretty lips and nut-white teeth, and say, "Schweig’
stille, mein Herze!"
Quite assured of his own strength of will, he did not seek for a moment
to withdraw himself from her, or raise any subtle barrier between them.
In fact, he mockingly explained to himself, that as compensation for the
pain which he would afterwards have to suffer, he would now sup to the
full the delicious enjoyment of her society. He would study as much as
he chose the fine artistic head, the beautiful, warm, Italian colour of
her face, and her charming figure; and he would gaze his fill into the
deep-grey eyes, which were always brightened up by an anticipatory
kindliness when he approached. He remarked, however, that he had never
seen them intensified by that passionate glow which he had observed on
the stage—the emotional earnestness which belonged to what she called
her "real life;" there was in the eyes merely a pleased satisfaction and
good nature.
"When shall we get away from the Rhine?" she asked, as they were sailing
past the black Loreleiberg.
"To-night," said the Count, "we shall stop at Mayence, and go on by rail
to Freiburg to-morrow. Then we shall be away from the line of the
tourists."
This was an extraordinary piece of generosity and concession on the part
of Count Schönstein; for there was scarcely anything he loved more
dearly on earth than to linger about the well-known routes, and figure
as a German Count before the Cockney-tourists who crowded the railway
stations and _tables d’hôte_.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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