“I can do but one thing more,” said he, “and that is--Love.”
“I thought,” said I, “you could make communion with the Deity.”
“And so I could,” he cried, angrily, “so I could; but I must first give
my glass rod an infinite rotation; the number of vibrations in a second
must be a number which is a multiple of _all_ other numbers,
however great; for that even my great fly-wheel must have an infinite
speed. Ah, your ‘loft with power’ does not give me that.... But it
would be only an idea if I could do that too, nothing but a rhythmic
motion in your brain.”...
Then my faith rose well above this idle chatter. But I kept silence;
for again my soul had passed out of the ken of this German doctor.
Althea I saw; Althea in the dark room before me; Althea, and I had
communion with her soul. Then I knew indeed that I did love her.
The ecstasy of that moment knew no time; it may have been a minute or
an hour, as we mortals measure it; it was but an eternity of bliss to
me.... Then followed again faith and hope, and then I awoke and saw
the room all radiant with the calm of that white light--the light that
Dante saw so near to God.
But it changed again to violet, like the glacier’s cave, blue like the
heavens, yellow like the day; then faded through the scarlet into night.
Again I was in a sea of thoughts and phantasies; the inspiration of a
Shakespeare, the fancy of a Mozart or a Titian, the study of a Newton,
all in turn were mine. And then my evil dreams began. Through lust to
greed of power, then to avarice, hatred, envy, and revenge, my soul was
driven like a leaf before the autumn wind.
Then I rose and flew at his throat once more. “Thou liest!” I cried.
“Heed not the rabble’s cry--God lies NOT in a rotting egg!”
I remember no more.
* * * * *
When I regained consciousness it was a winter twilight, and the room
was cold. I was alone in the doctor’s study and the machinery in the
house was stilled.... I went to the eastern window and saw that the
twilight was not the twilight of the dawn. I I must have slept all
day.... As I turned back I saw a folded paper on the table, and read,
in the doctor’s hand:
“In six hours you have passed through all the thoughts, all the wills,
and all the passions known to devils, men, or angels. You must now
sleep deeply or you die. I have put the lever on the rhythm of the
world, which is Sleep.
“In twelve hours I shall stop it, and you will wake.
“Then you had better go home and seek your finite sleep, or I have
known men lose their mind.”
* * * * *
I staggered out into the street, and sought my room. My head was still
dizzy, my brain felt tired, and my soul was sere. I felt like an old
man; and yet my heart was still half-drunk with sleep, and enamoured
with it, entranced with that profound slumber of the world to which all
consciousness comes as a sorrow.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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