It seems I became a mere spectator after that; my sister’s lead was
so assured for one thing, and, for another, the responsibility of
leaving Mabel alone--Frances laid it bodily upon my shoulders--was a
little more than I cared about. Moreover, when we all three met later
in the day, things went on so exactly as before, so absolutely without
friction or distress, that to present a sudden, obvious excuse for
cutting our visit short seemed ill-judged. And on the lowest grounds it
would have been desertion. At any rate, it was beyond my powers, and
Frances was quite firm that _she_ must stay. We therefore did stay.
Things that happen in the night always seem exaggerated and distorted
when the sun shines brightly next morning; no one can reconstruct the
terror of a nightmare afterwards, nor comprehend why it seemed so
overwhelming at the time.
I slept till ten o’clock, and when I rang for breakfast, a note from
my sister lay upon the tray, its message of counsel couched in a calm
and comforting strain. Mabel, she assured me, was herself again and
remembered nothing of what had happened; there was no need of any
violent measures; I was to treat her exactly as if I knew nothing.
‘And, if you don’t mind, Bill, let us leave the matter unmentioned
between ourselves as well. Discussion exaggerates; such things are best
not talked about. I’m sorry I disturbed you so unnecessarily; I was
stupidly excited. Please forget all the things I said at the moment.’
She had written ‘nonsense’ first instead of ‘things,’ then scratched
it out. She wished to convey that hysteria had been abroad in the
night, and I readily gulped the explanation down, though it could not
satisfy me in the smallest degree.
There was another week of our visit still, and we stayed it out to the
end without disaster. My desire to leave at times became that frantic
thing, desire to escape; but I controlled it, kept silent, watched
and wondered. Nothing happened. As before, and everywhere, there was
no sequence of development, no connection between cause and effect;
and climax, none whatever. The thing swayed up and down, backwards
and forwards like a great loose curtain in the wind, and I could only
vaguely surmise what caused the draught or why there was a curtain at
all. A novelist might mould the queer material into coherent sequence
that would be interesting but could not be true. It remains, therefore,
not a story but a history. Nothing happened.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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