"Why--this--this love-making, of ours! We mustn't give ourselves over
to sentiment--we must be normal and practical. We must look the thing
squarely in the face and settle on some course that will be best and
wisest for us both--"
She trembled a little. Something cold and terrifying began to creep
through her blood.
"Yes--I know," she faltered, nervously--"You said--you said we would
arrange everything together to-day."
"True! So I did! Well, I will!" He drew closer to her and took her
little hand in his own. "You see, dear, we can't live on the heights of
ecstasy for ever" and he smiled,--a forced, ugly smile--"We've had a
very happy time together, haven't we?"--and he was conscious of a
certain nervousness as he felt her soft little body press against him
in answer--"But the time has come for us to think of other
things--other interests--your career,--my future--"
She looked up at him in sudden alarm.
"Amadis!" she said--"What is it? You frighten me!--you speak so
strangely! What do you mean?"
"Now if you are unreasonable I shall go away!" he said, with sudden
harshness, dropping her hand--"I shall leave you here by yourself
without another word!"
She turned deathly pale--then flushed a faint crimson--a sense of giddy
faintness overcame her,--she put up her hands to her head tremblingly,
and loosening her hat took it off as though its weight oppressed her.
"I--I am not unreasonable, Amadis," she faltered--"only--I don't
understand--"
"Well, you ought to understand," he answered, heatedly--"A clever
little woman like you who writes books should not want any explanation.
You ought to be able to grasp the whole position at a glance!"
Her breath came and went quickly--she tried to smile.
"I'm afraid I'm very stupid then," she answered, gently--"For I can
only see that you seem angry with me for nothing."
He took her hand again.
"Dear little goose, I am not angry," he said--"If you were to make me a
'scene' I SHOULD be angry--very angry! But you won't do that, will you?
It would upset my nerves. And you are such a wise, independent little
person that I feel quite safe with you. Well, now let us talk
sensibly,--I've a great deal to tell you. In the first place, I'm going
to Algiers."
Her lips were dry and stiff, but she managed to ask--
"When?"
"Oh, any time!--to-morrow... next day--before the week is over,
certainly. There are some fine subjects out there that I want to
paint--and I feel I could do good work--"
Her hand in his contracted a little,--she instinctively withdrew it...
then she heard herself speaking as though it were someone else a long
way off.
"When are you coming back?"
"Ah!--That's my own affair!" he answered carelessly--"In the spring
perhaps,--perhaps not for a year or two--"
"Amadis!"
The name sprang from her lips like the cry of an animal wounded to
death. She rose suddenly from his side and stood facing him, swaying
slightly like a reed in a cruel wind.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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