The child was in her nightgown and had come to kiss them before going
to bed. She ran to her father, threw her arms around his neck, and gave
him a great bear hug. Long since she had forgotten his harshness of the
morning.
But he had neither forgotten nor forgiven himself. In the first place,
he had been unjust. The injunction against going to the barn had not
been a blanket one. It had applied only to that part of the building
where the blooded stallion was kept in a box stall. He had hurt her
feelings as a vent to his annoyance at what had taken place by the
creek a half-hour earlier. It was pretty small business, he admitted,
to take out his self-disgust on an innocent four-year-old.
He held Ruth close in his arms while Bridget waited smilingly and the
little one confided to him plans about the puppies.
“’N’ I’m gonna have Lon make me a wagon, ’n’ I’ll drive it jus’ like
Betty does the team, ’n’ I fink I’ll call the puppies Prince ’n’ Rover
’n’ Baby Fifi ’n’--’n’ everyfing,” she concluded all in a breath.
“That’ll be bully,” the father agreed, stroking the soft flaxen curls
fondly. He wondered reproachfully why it was that he could turn on
those he loved, as he had done on the child this morning. He had never
done it before with Ruth, and he resolved he never would again.
Ruth kissed Betty good-night and went out of the room in the arms of
Bridget, held close to her ample bosom, kicking and squealing with
delight because she was being tickled in the ribs.
As soon as Betty was in her own room, alone with her thoughts and the
rest of the world shut out, her mind went back to the problem of the
boy who had so early made such shipwreck of his life. She puzzled
over this while she was preparing for bed and afterward while she
lay between the white sheets, barred squares from the window frames
checkering the moonlight on the linen. What in the world could cause a
man, educated, clean-fibered, strong, to let go of life like that?
It could not be a woman. In spite of her youth, she knew this by
instinct. A game man did not give up because of blows dealt to him
from the outside. The surrender had to come from within. No wounds at
the hands of another can subdue the indomitable soul. Young though
she was, she knew that. Books of fiction might say the contrary,
but she had a sure conviction they were wrong. What was it Browning
said?--“...Incentives come from the soul’s self.” Well, the converse of
it must also be true.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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