Isaac Bickerstaff, Physician and AstrologerSteele, Richard, Sir
General
Isaac Bickerstaff, Physician and Astrologer
Steele, Richard, Sir
English wit and humor; Fictitious characters -- Autobiography
While I was thus dispensing justice, I heard a noise in my outward room;
and inquiring what was the occasion of it, my door-keeper told me, that
they had taken one up in the very fact as he was passing by my door.
They immediately brought in a lively fresh-coloured young man, who made
great resistance with hand and foot, but did not offer to make use of
his cane, which hung upon his fifth button. Upon examination, I found
him to be an Oxford scholar who was just entered at the Temple. He at
first disputed the jurisdiction of the court; but, being driven out of
his little law and logic, he told me very pertly, "that he looked upon
such a perpendicular creature as man to make a very imperfect figure
without a cane in his hand. It is well known," says he, "we ought,
according to the natural situation of our bodies, to walk upon our hands
and feet: and that the wisdom of the ancients had described man to be an
animal of four legs in the morning, two at noon, and three at night; by
which they intimated that a cane might very properly become part of us
in some period of life." Upon which I asked him, whether he wore it at
his breast to have it in readiness when that period should arrive. My
young lawyer immediately told me, he had a property in it, and a right
to hang it where he pleased, and to make use of it as he thought fit,
provided that he did not break the peace with it; and farther said,
that he never took it off his button, unless it were to lift it up at a
coachman, hold it over the head of a drawer, point out the circumstances
of a story, or for other services of the like nature, that are all
within the laws of the land. I did not care for discouraging a young
man, who, I saw, would come to good; and, because his heart was set upon
his new purchase, I only ordered him to wear it about his neck, instead
of hanging it upon his button, and so dismissed him.
There were several appeared in court, whose pretensions I found to be
very good, and, therefore, gave them their licenses upon paying their
fees; as many others had their licenses renewed, who required more time
for recovery of their lameness than I had before allowed them.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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