"But can't you guess at all? Not even the name?" persisted her sister.
"No. But I think somewhere abroad; a long way off. And that would cost
money. Yes, more money than we have, a great deal," sighed Amy.
"Ah!" said the child, "when I'm grown up I'll marry a man with lots of
money, just like Mr. Vavasour. Hannah says he's awfully rich; and then
he should take us away to a lovely place by the sea-side where Mamma and
all of us could live like princesses. I am sure she would get well
then."
This innocent remark of Sarah's was a home-thrust to Amy; a death blow
to her hopes, and roused her at once. Should she sit so quietly and
passively when her mother's life was at stake? Nurse and hoard up a love
in her heart that she was ashamed had ever entered there from its very
hopelessness and selfishness? There was Dr. Ashley coming up the walk,
she would first ask his opinion as to the necessity of a change; and if
he thought it necessary? Then--then. Once again Amy sighed, and said,
"It is my fate; it must be so," and then went out into the other room,
and quietly awaited the doctor's coming.
Some ten minutes elapsed, during which Amy was restless and anxious;
still she would not pause to think now, lest her heart should give way;
so she walked about even as Frances Strickland often did in her
impatient moods, took up the books one by one off the table and looked
at their titles--read them she could not--and then the doctor's heavy
tread sounded on the staircase, and she went out and met him.
"Will you come in here, Dr. Ashley?" she said. "I want to thank you for
so kindly coming to see Mamma. It is so very kind of you." Amy knew
nothing of the ten pound note so carefully stowed away in his waistcoat
pocket for the expenses of his homeward journey.
"Pray say no more, my dear Miss Neville," he said. "It pains me."
And Amy did not. Perhaps she thought it was painful to be thanked for
what in her innermost heart she half suspected he was paid for.
"How did you find Mamma, Dr. Ashley?" she asked.
"Well, not quite so bright as yesterday, but still no material change
for the worse. Dr Sellon tells me she often has these ups and downs."
"Any unusual excitement appears to weaken her for the time. Dr. Sellon
does not attend regularly. I only call him in when I think Mamma really
requires it."
"Quite right. Your mother's case is one requiring care and--and
everything good and strengthening you can give her."
"Do you think Mamma very ill?" Amy could not bring herself to ask if he
thought she would recover, although that thought had been at her heart
for days, and she had driven it away and would not give it utterance.
"There is weakness,--great weakness," he replied. "I cannot see that
Mrs. Neville has any other disease."
"But--but I fear you are evading my question, Dr. Ashley. I wish to know
exactly what your opinion is of Mamma."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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