Fairy tales -- Parodies, imitations, etc.; Short stories, American
"Diggville! Change cars for Easy Street and Fortune Square!" cried the
hoarse voice at the door, and Wilbraham, looking out through the window
again, was rejoiced to find himself back amid familiar scenes.
"They're working all right," he said, gleefully.
"Yes," said his wife. "They seem to be and you seem to be speculating as
usual upon a narrow margin. Again you have only one wish left, having
squandered four out of the five already used."
"And why not, my dear," smiled Wilbraham, amiably, "when my next wish is
to be for six spandy new wishes straight from the factory?"
Mrs. Wilbraham's face cleared.
"Oh, splendid!" she cried, joyously. "Wish it--wish it--do hurry before
you forget."
"I do wish it--six more wishes on the half-shell!" roared Wilbraham.
As before, came the thunder and the lightning.
"Thank you!" said Wilbraham. "These fairies are mighty prompt
correspondents. I am beginning to see my way out of our difficulties,
Ethelinda," he proceeded, rubbing his hands together unctuously.
"Instead of dreading to-morrow and the maturity of that beastly old
mortgage, I wish to thunder it were here, and that the confounded thing
were paid off."
The wish, expressed impulsively, brought about the most astonishing
results. The hall clock began instantly to whirr and to wheeze, its
hands whizzing about as though upon a well-oiled pivot. The sun shot up
out of the eastern horizon as though fired from a cannon, and before the
amazed couple could realize what was going on, the village clock struck
the hour of noon, and they found themselves bowing old Colonel Digby,
the mortgage holder, out of the house, while Wilbraham himself held in
his right hand a complete satisfaction of that depressing document.
"Now," said Wilbraham, "I feel like celebrating. What would you say to a
nice little luncheon, my dear? Something simple, but good--say some
Russian caviare, Lynnhaven Bay oysters, real turtle soup, terrapin,
canvas-back duck, alligator-pear salad, and an orange brûlot for two,
eh?"
"It would be fine, Richard," replied the lady, her eyes flashing with
joy, "but I don't know where we could get such a feast here. The
Diggville markets are--"
"Markets?" cried Wilbraham, contemptuously. "What have we to do with
markets from this time on? Markets are nothing to me. I merely wish that
we had that repast right here and now, ready to--"
"Luncheon is served, sir," said a tall, majestic-looking stranger,
entering from the dining-room.
"Ah! Really?" said Wilbraham. "And who the dickens are you?"
"I am the head butler of the Fairies' Union assigned to your service,
sir," replied the stranger, civilly, making a low bow to Mrs. Wilbraham.
There is no use of describing the meal. It was all there as foreshadowed
in Wilbraham's gastronomically inspired menu, and having had nothing to
eat since the night before, the fortunate couple did full justice to it.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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