Fairy tales -- Parodies, imitations, etc.; Short stories, American
"No, my dear," sighed the little voice. "That note, unfortunately, is
stored away in a steel vault, and my teeth are not strong enough to
nibble through that. I have a more business-like method to get you both
out of your troubles. After you have purchased the bar of gold, take it
home with you and devise some convenient means of getting rid of the
straw without anybody seeing you do it. The best way to do this will be
to carry an armful of it at a time up on to the roof of your house and
let it blow away; and then, when next Monday comes, and your father is
required to deliver the first consignment of the precious metal to
Colonel Midas, go with him to the Colonel's office, yourself, taking
the gold bar with you, and see that it is really delivered. Wear your
most bewitching hat, and don't fail to remember what a woman's eyes were
given her for."
"Oh, thank you, thank you, thank you!" cried Gasmerilda, a great wave of
happiness sweeping over her. "If I could get at you, dear Fairy
Godmother, over the 'phone, I should hug you to death."
"That is all right, child. My reward will come later," replied the fairy
godmother. "When your profits begin to come in you may pay me a
commission of ten per cent. on all you get."
"Gladly. I'll make it fifteen per cent.," cried the grateful girl. "But
how shall you be paid?"
"By check, dear, drawn to the order of The Fairy's Aid Society of
America, of which I am the president," was the answer. "The address is
just Wall Street, New York. And now, sweet dreams, my beloved ward. The
sun of your troubles has set, and the dawn of prosperity is here."
With a happy smile Gasmerilda wished her kindly friend good-night, and
retired to her couch and slept the sleep of a weary child. Bright and
early the next morning, with her little gold-chain purse containing the
necessary funds dangling from her chatelaine, she appeared at the assay
office, and purchased there a shining bar of the lustrous metal,
returning to her home in time for luncheon.
"Well, daughter," said the miller, as he met her in the hallway, "how
does the good work proceed?"
"Very well, indeed, father," she said, with a cheery smile. "I'm a
little out of practise, but I managed to spin about ninety-eight
dollars' worth last night before going to bed."
The miller blinked amazedly at his daughter. This answer was indeed the
most extraordinary substitute for the floods of tears he had expected to
greet his question.
"You--you--you dud--don't--m--m--mean to sus--say--" he stammered.
"Father, dear, did you ever try to cut calves-foot jelly with a steel
knife?" she asked.
"Yes, child, yes--but what of that?" he demanded, completely nonplussed.
"Well, dear," she answered, kissing him on the tip end of his nose,
"that is hard labor compared to spinning gold out of straw."
She ran from him, laughing merrily as she hurried up the stairs to her
room, while he, staggering back against the newel-post of the staircase,
leaned on it, breathing heavily.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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