Fairy tales -- Parodies, imitations, etc.; Short stories, American
But lo and behold! the following morning a strange thing had happened.
Jack, upon waking early, found his once sunny window obscured by a heavy
growth of leaves, and on dressing rapidly and going into the garden to
see what had caused this strange condition of affairs, was surprised to
find a splendid bean-stalk sprung up during the night, and, what was
still more wonderful, still springing, moving rapidly upward like the
escalator he had once seen upon the elevated railway in New York when
with his father he had visited that wonderful city to inspect the spring
and autumn styles for the haberdashery.
He gazed at it in wondering amazement, and then the silence was broken.
"All aboard for Ogreville!" cried a squeaky little voice from behind one
of the branches. "Step lively, please! All aboard!"
Jack, nothing loath for a new experience, immediately seated himself
astride one of the rapidly rising tendrils, and soon found himself
soaring in the upper air, far, far above the earth, upon what he came
subsequently to call his "Aero-Bean."
"Well, we have you at last," said the squeaky little voice from behind
the leaves, pleasantly. "You may not remember it, my lad, but you once
gave up your strap on a subway train to a tired-looking woman and she
has never forgotten your kindness. It so happens that she was Queen of
the Fairies, and later on she became Chairman of the Board of Directors
of the United States Fairy Corporation of Wall Street. You are now about
to receive your reward. You have Major Bilkins's check-book with you?"
"Yes," said Jack. "He threw it at me yesterday, and I've had it ever
since."
"Good!" said the squeaky little voice. "What is the old man's balance?"
"Three million five hundred and seventy-five thousand four hundred and
fifty-seven dollars," said Jack, reading off the figures slowly, and
gasping at the thought of anybody's having so much money as that on
hand.
"H'm!" said the squeaky little voice. "It is rather less than I had
thought. However, we can fix that without much trouble. Zeros are
cheap. Just add six of them to that balance."
"Do you mean add or affix?" asked Jack.
"Affix is what I should have said," replied the squeaky little voice.
"Get out your fountain pen and tag 'em on."
Jack immediately obeyed.
"Now what does it come to?" asked the little voice.
"Three trillion five hundred and seventy-five billion four hundred and
fifty-seven million dollars," stammered Jack, his eyes bulging with
amazement.
"That's better," laughed the little voice. "Thus you see, my boy, how
easy it is to make much out of a little if you only know how. Three and
a half trillions is a pretty tidy bit of pocket-money for a boy of your
age. So be careful how you use it, my son. Use it wisely, and all will
be well with you."
As the voice spoke these words the growing stalk came to a sudden stop,
and the voice added:
"Ogreville! Last stop! All out!"
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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