As frequent mention has been made of the diaries, it may be well to
state that these for the most part contain little or nothing save
the barest records of mapping done, hours of work, memoranda as to
expenses, and so forth. Those of the first year or two, however, not
unnaturally, since the work was entirely new, are a little fuller. That
for 1862, if it ever existed, does not seem to have been preserved;
but 1863 contains one or two interesting entries, which emphasise
still further the point already made as to the enthusiasm, plans,
and ambitions with which the Survey was entered. On its first leaf
the following lines are written:--“Was not so old last year as I am
this--fact for the curious biographer who is no doubt destined to
reap immortality by the interesting use he will make of the copious
entries in this diary.” But as for many weeks afterwards the “curious
biographer” finds no written word beyond the statement that drawing
pens were bought at an outlay of 1s. 6d., it is to be feared that
no superstructure in regard to an expectation of future fame can be
built upon the entry. The corresponding page on next year’s diary is
more prosaic, for it bears only a series of “Memoranda” which include
an injunction to get a wife when income allows, and to have only
three children, two boys and one girl. Rather oddly there is a letter
extant which announces the birth of his third child, many years later,
and bewails the fact that it is another boy, when a girl would have
“rounded off the family so nicely.” The much-loved daughter did not
appear on the scene till many years afterwards.
From the 1863 diary two short entries may be quoted, for they stand
side by side on the same page, and are in many ways very characteristic
of the man. The first relates to a day spent in indoor work, though
with the careful corollary that this was not due to the weather.
Opposite this formal entry is written:--“Mouth filled with cursings and
my heart with evil thoughts, all owing to the squalling and girning of
an ill-natured, red-headed, unwashed, petted, fractious imp--the son
and heir of our landlord, the shepherd.” Some of the epithets have been
omitted--the provocation was doubtless extreme!
The following day was spent in the open air, and opposite stands
this:--“Meet J. Y. on top of Black Law; walk back to Summerhope by way
of the old churchyard. Exquisite moonlight night. Scene inexpressibly
sad--feel of course very sentimental; and have a whole troop of
depressing thoughts and reminiscences,--some of which cause me to
heave sighs like the bellows of the Village Blacksmith. The ingenious
biographer will never guess what these sighs were for, nor have I any
intention of enlightening him.”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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