Jeremy and Hamlet: A Chronicle of Certain Incidents in the Lives of a Boy, a Dog, and a Country TownWalpole, Hugh
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Jeremy and Hamlet: A Chronicle of Certain Incidents in the Lives of a Boy, a Dog, and a Country Town
Walpole, Hugh
Boys -- Fiction; Dogs -- Fiction; England -- Social life and customs -- 19th century -- Fiction
Coming out of school at half-past twelve, he found to his exquisite
delight that there was a letter for him. He was, of course, far from
that grown-up attitude of terror and misgiving at the sight of the daily
post. Not for him yet were bills and unwelcome reminiscence, broken
promises and half-veiled threats. He received from his mother one letter
a week, from his father perhaps three a term, and from his sister Mary
an occasional confused scribbling that, like her stories, introduced so
many characters one after another that the most you obtained from them
was a sense of life and of people passing and of Mary’s warm and
emotional heart. Once and again he had a letter from Uncle Samuel, and
these were the real glories. It was natural that on this day of days
there should be such a letter. The very sight of his uncle’s
handwriting—a thin, spidery one that was in some mysterious way charged
with beauty and colour—cockled his heart and made him warm all over. He
sat in a corner of the playground where he was least likely to be
disturbed and read it. It was as follows. It began abruptly, as did all
Uncle Samuel’s letters:
Your mother has just taken your Aunt Amy to Drymouth on a
shopping expedition. The house is so quiet you wouldn’t know it.
I am painting a very nice picture of two cows in a blue field.
The cows are red. If you were here I would put you into the
picture as a dog asleep under a tree. Because you aren’t here, I
have to take that wretched animal of yours and use him instead.
He is not nearly as like a dog as you are. I had two sausages
for breakfast because your Aunt Amy is going to be away for two
whole days. I generally have only one sausage and now just about
five o’clock this evening I shall have indigestion which will be
one more thing I shall owe your Aunt Amy. The woman came in
yesterday and washed the floor of the studio. It looks beastly,
but I shall soon make it dirty again, and if only you were here
it would get dirty quicker. There’s a rumour that your Uncle
Percy is coming back to stay with us again. I am training your
dog to bite the sort of trousers that your Uncle Percy wears. I
have a pair very like his and I draw them across the floor very
slowly and make noises to your dog like a cat. The plan is very
successful but to-morrow there won’t be any trousers and I shall
have to think of something else. Mrs. Sampson asked your mother
whether she thought that I would like to paint a portrait of her
little girl. I asked your mother how much money Mrs. Sampson
would give me for doing so and your mother asked Mrs. Sampson.
Mrs. Sampson said that if she liked it when it was done she’d
hang it up in her drawing-room where everybody could see and
that that would be such a good advertisement for me that there
wouldn’t need to be any payment, so I told your mother to tell
Mrs.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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