'It is a book written by an atheist for atheists; it might almost be
called the Atheist's Bible, Jessie.'
'And did you never speak to your mother about uncle Bryan's religion?
'I have tried to, but mother is like me; there are some things she
does not like to speak of.'
'And this is one of them,' said Jessie, following out her train of
thought; 'and out of your love for her, when she said, "Let us talk of
something else, my dear," you have talked of something else.'
'That is so, Jessie. It is almost as if you overheard what we said.'
'It is easy to see into your mother's heart, Chris. She did not like
to speak about uncle Bryan's religion, because she loves him, and
because she wants you to love him. Now, if it had been anything that
would have made uncle Bryan stand out in a good light, she would have
encouraged you to speak about it.'
'That is true enough, Jessie.'
'Chris, your mother is all heart.'
'She is everything that is good, if you mean that?'
'I do mean that; she is the best, the sweetest, the dearest woman in
the world. Ah, if I were like her! But I am very, very different. What
I say and what I think comes more often out of my head than out of my
heart. Chris, it is impossible for an atheist to be a good man!'
I saw the pit we were walking into, but I had not the skill to lead
Jessie away from it.
'A man who does not believe in God,' she exclaimed, 'cannot believe in
anything good. No wonder that he is what he is. I am not satisfied--I
am not satisfied! It is shocking--shocking to think of!' She shook her
head at herself, and I listened to her words in no pleasant frame of
mind. She was showing me an entirely new phase in her character. It
was Jessie reasoning, and reasoning on the most solemn of subjects.
'Why,' she continued, 'God made everything that's good, and if uncle
Bryan is an atheist, he is a bad man. And yet your mother loves him.'
'That she does, Jessie, with all her heart.'
'She couldn't love anything that's bad. If you were an atheist, Chris,
I should hate you.'
'Thank God, I am not, Jessie; even if I were, you could make me
different. But I don't like to hear you speak like this,' I said,
reproaching myself bitterly for having been the cause of this
conversation; for when I had told Jessie that uncle Bryan was an
atheist I had spoken with a full measure of dislike towards him.
'Mother does not reason as you do. After all, I may be mistaken,
Jessie, and we maybe doing him a great injustice. I know so much that
is good of him--more than you possibly imagine.'
And then I told her what, from a false feeling of shame, I had
hitherto withheld from her--the story of my mother's hard battle with
the world when we came to London, and of uncle Bryan's noble behaviour
to us when we were sunk in the bitterest poverty.
'All the time I have known him, Jessie, I have never known him to be
guilty of an unjust action. He is as upright and honest a man as ever
lived. Can such a man be a bad man?'
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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