She did not go back at once, she paced the streets for a long time;
perhaps then some hardness was growing up in her heart--some new
bitterness at the fashion in which everything and everyone seemed to
have conspired to set her aside. When at last she turned her steps
towards Locker Street it had grown very late, and she was very tired;
she walked with lagging feet.
She got to the house and let herself in; the house was dark and silent.
Going slowly up the stairs, she had a mental picture of what she must
find when she reached her own rooms--Patience asleep in her chair, or
Patience asleep in her bed in her own small room. Perhaps, worst of all,
Patience asking questions--demanding querulously to know where she had
been; perhaps speaking of Jimmy. No--she would not face that yet; she
could not face it now. And so she halted on her way, and listened at the
door of Charlie's room for a sound within; rapped lightly, and, getting
no reply, turned the handle. The room was empty.
But the fire burned brightly, and the room held a welcome for her after
the wet and chilly streets. Charlie would come in presently, and they
could talk for a little while before she went to bed. For quite
desperately she wanted someone to whom to talk to-night--someone who
loved her; and Charlie had said, times without number, how much he loved
her. Poor Charlie, who was unsuccessful, and yet had always a good word
for her--always a smile with which to greet her.
She took off her hat and laid it down; presently stretched herself at
length on the shabby old sofa, and laid her cheek on her palm and looked
into the fire. The room was very silent; only the fire ticked a little
as it fell together; even the streets were quiet. Lying there, she
thought of what her life was to be, in all the days that were coming to
her--days of poverty and of struggle such as she had known for so long.
"Charlie and I will be together--and perhaps I shall be able to help
him," she murmured to herself. "It won't be so bad--with the firelight
in the winter--and a quiet room; and in the summer, when the sun shines,
the streets and the parks--and perhaps sometimes a glimpse of the
country. It won't be so bad--and there will be Charlie. And perhaps
Jimmy will----"
She broke off there, because her eyes had filled with tears, and she
could not go on. She turned her face a little, so that her arm hid it
from the fire; she seemed to murmur there a little brokenly: "Jimmy--you
might have remembered"--and again, "Jimmy!"
Then from sheer weariness she slept, and dreamed that she was back again
in the old days and the sun was shining. London was but a far-off dream,
and she did not know what it would be like. And so, when presently
Charlie Purdue opened the door and looked in, he saw her.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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