And it was, still more oddly, from the Peculiars that she received the
bulk of her custom, and this despite her top-lofty airs towards them,
and the tracts suggesting that souls, no less than bonnets, could be
bleached as good as new. Possibly their more elastic spirituality
vibrated more readily to the moving angel: perhaps the real bond of
sympathy was that they knew her unpopular with the Church: like
themselves a butt of legend, and lacking even their advantage of
Bradmarsh birth.
But even the Churchwomen did not utterly deny patronage to this talented
needlewoman, nor refuse her the deference due to weekday gloves, a
parasol, and bills with printed headlines; they did not even
discountenance her crusade against Dissent, though her copious allusions
to Providence “moving in a mysterious way” were felt to be too broadly
autobiographic. Moreover, in view of the caustic remarks upon cardinals,
Puseyites, black-robed priests, and winking pictures, by which her
tracts began to diversify the attack upon Dissent—for John Bull was
getting alarmed at the new Roman invasion—it was a source of surprise
that she failed to see the beam in her own eye. For if Virgins could not
wink in Rimini, why should Angels wobble in Colchester? To add to her
oddity, her brain was full of ancient maggots of astrology and medicine,
crept in from “Culpeper’s Herbal,” her one bedside book.
That Bundock should be bringing a bonnet commission to this excellent
and industrious, if freakish female, was the more laudable, inasmuch as
he nourished a prejudice against her and her tracts. Not that he held
with Catholic or evangelical Dissenters any more than with the Church
proper. As a follower of Tom Paine, whose “Age of Reason” he read
piously in bed every Sunday morning—the passage asserting that to make
a true miracle Jonah should have swallowed the whale was a regular
Lesson—he regarded himself as a great free spirit in an illiterate and
priest-ridden world, one whose God was everywhere except in Church. Not
that he could follow the Master’s excursions into trigonometry or
astronomy or knew anything of his idol’s “Rights of Man,” being indeed
singularly free from the contemporary unrest of the industrial townsman,
and combining, like greater men, a crusty conservatism for the old order
with a radical rejection of its spinal creed. Possibly his devotion to
the still youthful Queen was part of his softness for the sex, for the
only part of “The Age of Reason” that left him unconvinced was its
impugnment of the wisdom of Solomon, its contention that “seven hundred
wives and three hundred concubines are worse than none.” But it was not
Tom Paine, nor even Bob Taylor’s “The Devil’s Chaplain,” it was the long
years of his father’s paralysis that had first sapped his faith in the
pharmacopœian aspects of prayer, though he considerately concealed his
defection from his bed-ridden parent, and even the visiting elders
withheld the racking information.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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