But Duke had dramatically dumped the book down side by side with its
twin. “Look on this picture and on that!” he said. “Duke’s Marionettes,
week ending March 10th, 1849, Colchester. Total, £23 18s. 10d. Flippance
Fit-Up, Colchester Corn Exchange, week ending March 8th, 1851. Monday.
Eleven shillings. _There’s_ an opening! Tuesday——”
“Oh, come to the d——d total!” said Tony impatiently.
“There ain’t any total,” said Duke crushingly. “Tuesday, sixteen
shillings and sixpence.”
“Always rising, you see!” said Tony.
“Wednesday,” Duke went on implacably, “nine shillings and fourpence——”
“Why, how do you get fourpence?” interrupted Tony severely. “You haven’t
been letting down the prices, I hope.”
“That’s noted at the side. See!” said the careful Duke. “A swindler
passed off a groat as a tanner. Thursday, Eight and sixpence—imagine
the Colchester Corn Exchange with eight and sixpence! Friday. Nine
shillings——”
“Rising again, you see,” chirruped Tony.
“Saturday. One pound thirteen and six.”
“There you are! That pulls you up.”
“Saturday evening,” concluded Duke. “Two pounds eight.”
“And then he grumbles!” Mr. Flippance raised his great ringed hands
towards Jinny.
“Total, six pounds five and tenpence!”
“And isn’t that enough to live on?” cried Tony. “Only two in family and
a little bird or so! And if your box-office man had been smart enough to
tell a groat from a tester, you’d have had six guineas!”
“He wasn’t such a fool,” said Duke dryly, “for on another night it’s
noted that a half-sovereign was passed off on him for sixpence.”
“And then you outrage Providence by complaining of the takings,” said
Tony.
“Rent of Corn Exchange,” continued Duke doggedly, “three guineas.
Salaries (to company, including check-taker), four pounds eight.
Lighting, a pound. Advertising (including bill-poster), three pounds
ten——”
“But, my dear chap, what extravagance! No wonder——”
“Travelling expenses (company and scenery, excluding caravan), eighteen
and ninepence. Drinks to Pressmen—one and sixpence——”
“Oh, not enough! No wonder——!”
“Net deficit, seven pounds sixteen and threepence, _plus_ the salary of
Bianca and me!”
“What! Why, you said salary of company, four pounds eight!”
“You don’t suppose I included ourselves with the check-taker!”
“You didn’t? Oh, my dear fellow,” said Tony sympathetically, “no wonder
you’re down in the mouth. A wise manager always pays his salary before
any other expense; then he’s always sure of a stand-by!”
“It isn’t the money that’s the worst,” Duke explained. “It’s the
dreadful loneliness.”
“Why didn’t you stuff the house with paper and put up ‘Free List
Absolutely Suspended’?”
“Easier said than done in a place where you don’t know a soul. Why,
Bianca had a Benefit Night, and how many do you think were in the
stalls? Two women and a boy.”
“I’ve known only the theatre cat——” began Tony cheerfully.
“And the boy went to sleep!”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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