167. A _Frenchman_ travelling between _Dover_ and _London_, came into an Inn to lodge, where the Host perceiving him a close-fisted Cur, having called for nothing but a Pint of Beer and a Pennyworth of Bread to eat with a Sallad he had gathered by the Way, resolved to fit him for it, therefore seemingly paid him an extraordinary Respect, laid him a clean Cloth for Supper, and complimented him with the best Bed in the House. In the Morning he set a good Sallad before him, with Cold Meat, Butter, _&c_., which provok'd the Monsieur to the Generosity of calling for half a Pint of Wine; then coming to pay, the Host gave him a Bill, which, for the best Bed, Wine, Sallad, and other Appurtenances, he had enhanc'd to the Value of twenty Shillings. _Jernie_, says the _Frenchman_, Twenty Shillings! _Vat you mean?_ But all his sputtering was in vain; for the Host with a great deal of Tavern-Elocution, made him sensible that nothing could be 'bated. The Monsieur therefore seeing no Remedy but Patience, seem'd to pay it chearfully. After which he told the Host, that his House being extremely troubled with Rats, he could give him a Receipt to drive 'em away, so as they should never return again. The Host being very desirous to be rid of those troublesome Guests, who were every Day doing him one Mischief or other, at length concluded to give Monsieur twenty Shillings for a Receipt; which done, _Beggar_, says the Monsieur, _you make a de Rat one such Bill as you make me, and if ever dey trouble your House again, me will be hang_. 168. A young Gentleman playing at Questions and Commands with some very pretty young Ladies, was commanded to take off a Garter from one of them; but she, as soon as he had laid hold of her Petticoats, ran away into the next Room, where was a Bed, now, Madam, said he, I _bar_ squeaking, _Bar_ the Door, you Fool, cry'd she. 169. A _Westminster_ Justice taking Coach in the City, and being set down at _Young Man's_ Coffee-house, _Charing-Cross_, the Driver demanded Eighteen-Pence as his Fare; the Justice asked him, if he would swear that the Ground came to the Money; the Man said, he would take his Oath on't. The Justice replyed, _Friend, I am a Magistrate_, and pulling a Book out of his Pocket, administer'd the Oath, and then gave the Fellow _Six-pence_, saying _he must reserve the Shilling to himself for the_ Affidavit. 170. A Countryman passing along the _Strand_ saw a Coach overturn'd, and asking what the Matter was? He was told, that three or four Members of Parliament were overturned in that Coach: Oh, says he, there let them lie, _my Father always advis'd me not to meddle with State Affairs_. 171. One saying that Mr. _Dennis_ was an excellent Critick, was answered, that indeed his Writings were much to be valued; for that by his Criticism he taught Men how to write well, and by his Poetry, shew'd 'em what it was to write ill; so that the World was sure to edify by him.