1001. The father of a late Lord Hardwicke was hanged for forgery. When Lord H. sat as chancellor, an old countryman was examined as to a particular fact, the exact date of which he could not recollect. All that I remember about it, said he, is, that it happened on the day old Yorke was hanged. 1002. A theatrical lady, celebrated for everything but continence, at length resolved to marry and reform. Her conduct was duly canvassed in the dressing-rooms of the theatres. I am told, cried one, that she confessed to her liege lord all her amours. What a proof of courage! exclaimed one lady. What an extraordinary instance of candour! said another. What an amazing instance of memory! cried a third. 1003. Elliston had many friends and some relations in the church. Visiting one of the latter, who had some occasion to call upon his clerk, who was also the town crier, Elliston accompanied his friend; the crier was from home, and whilst the reverend gentleman explained to the man’s wife the nature of his visit, Elliston looked over two or three things that had been left to be cried that evening, amongst others, one was of a dog lost, who, amid his peculiar spots and blemishes, had “sore eyes;” Elliston always alive for a joke, altered the word sore to four. The crier came home, took up the several notices and commenced his round, enunciating in sonorous tones, Lost a black and tan coloured terrier, and answers to the name of Carlo; has two black legs and four eyes. You vagabond, cried the traveller to whom the dog belonged, how do you think I shall ever get my dog, if you describe it in that way? The crier maintained that it was according to the original, and, upon examination, it was evident the paper had been tampered with. Home went the crier, boiling with indignation; his wife had informed him of the call of his reverend employer, but had said nothing about his companion, and therefore no doubt remained on the clerk’s mind, that his reverend master himself had played the trick. He awaited patiently until Sunday for his revenge, and before he took his seat in the clerk’s pew, removed the book of St. John from the New Testament. The clergyman gave out the lesson, as the 2nd chapter of St. John, (the clerk had previously known it was to be selected from thence,) and then began to look in vain for the book in question; at last he whispered to the clerk, What has become of St. John? He can’t come, was the reply, he has got sore eyes. 1004. Dr. Carpue always gave it as his opinion, that Mathews, the comedian, had experienced improper treatment at the time of his accident, and that had he been in judicious hands, he would not have been lame. Some one speaking upon this subject to R―, said, I understand Mathews means to leave his broken leg to Carpue when he dies. The devil he does! said R―; well, for my part, I should be sorry to have such a leg-as-he (legacy).