John Ingerfield, and Other StoriesJerome, Jerome K. (Jerome Klapka)
General
John Ingerfield, and Other Stories
Jerome, Jerome K. (Jerome Klapka)
England -- Social life and customs -- 19th century -- Fiction; Short stories
Anne’s commands are spoken very sweetly, and are accompanied by the
sweetest of smiles; but they are nevertheless commands, and somehow it
does not occur to any one to disobey them. John—stern, masterful,
authoritative John, who has never been approached with anything more
dictatorial than a timid request since he left Merchant Taylors’ School
nineteen years ago, who would have thought that something had suddenly
gone wrong with the laws of Nature if he had been—finds himself
hurrying along the street on his way to a druggist’s shop, slackens his
pace an instant to ask himself why and wherefore he is doing so,
recollects that he was told to do so and to make haste back, marvels
who could have dared to tell him to do anything and to make haste back,
remembers that it was Anne, is not quite sure what to think about it,
but hurries on. He “makes haste back,” is praised for having been so
quick, and feels pleased with himself; is sent off again in another
direction, with instructions what to say when he gets there. He starts
off (he is becoming used to being ordered about now). Halfway there
great alarm seizes him, for on attempting to say over the message to
himself, to be sure that he has it quite right, he discovers he has
forgotten it. He pauses, nervous and excited; cogitates as to whether
it will be safe for him to concoct a message of his own, weighs
anxiously the chances—supposing that he does so—of being found out.
Suddenly, to his intense surprise and relief, every word of what he was
told to say comes back to him; and he hastens on, repeating it over and
over to himself as he walks, lest it should escape him again.
And then a few hundred yards farther on there occurs one of the most
extraordinary events that has ever happened in that street before or
since: John Ingerfield laughs.
John Ingerfield, of Lavender Wharf, after walking two-thirds of Creek
Lane, muttering to himself with his eyes on the ground, stops in the
middle of the road and laughs; and one small boy, who tells the story
to his dying day, sees him and hears him, and runs home at the top of
his speed with the wonderful news, and is conscientiously slapped by
his mother for telling lies.
All that day Anne works like a heroine, John helping her, and
occasionally getting in the way. By night she has her little hospital
prepared and three beds already up and occupied; and, all now done that
can be done, she and John go upstairs to his old rooms above the
counting-house.
John ushers her into them with some misgiving, for by contrast with the
house at Bloomsbury they are poor and shabby. He places her in the
arm-chair near the fire, begging her to rest quiet, and then assists
his old housekeeper, whose wits, never of the strongest, have been
scared by the day’s proceeding, to lay the meal.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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