John Smith's Funny Adventures on a Crutch: Or The Remarkable Peregrinations of a One-legged Soldier after the WarHill, A. F. (Ashbel Fairchild)
History
John Smith's Funny Adventures on a Crutch: Or The Remarkable Peregrinations of a One-legged Soldier after the War
Hill, A. F. (Ashbel Fairchild)
Disabled veterans -- United States -- Fiction; United States -- History -- Civil War, 1861-1865 -- Veterans -- Fiction
In the city of Portland I hired a horse and sleigh one morning, and
resolved to drive a few miles into the country. It was snowing
vigorously, but was not very cold; I had a spirited horse before me; a
good light sleigh under me; and away I went, bounding over the road,
neither knowing nor caring whither I went. By and by, when I had
traveled five or six miles, and distanced a number of other travelers,
in similar vehicles, on the way, I saw a town just ahead of me. The snow
was still falling so briskly that I was almost in the town before I saw
it. As I drove along, I asked a boy what place it was, and he said,
“Westbrook.” I entered the village, and found it to be one of
considerable extent. In fact, I drove half-a-mile, and still there was
no end of houses. On the contrary, they became thicker and thicker; and
I began to conclude that “Westbrook” must be quite a city. By and by I
found myself on a street that reminded me forcibly of one I had seen in
Portland; and, what made it more remarkable, I observed that it rejoiced
in the same name. What a coincidence! But I marveled more still, as I
followed this street a little way and passed an hotel that was the very
image of the one I stayed at in Portland—and lo! there stood at the door
a porter who was dark-skinned and cross-eyed, exactly like the porter of
my hotel in that city! Was I dreaming? No, not exactly; but I must have
been during my drive, for I had wandered around among the country roads
in the snow-storm, lost my reckoning, and actually entered Portland
again. I had come in through a little suburban village, north of the
city, called “Westbrook;” and hence my delusion.
In Rutland, a beautiful little city nestling in a kind of basin high up
among the Green Mountains of Vermont, I arrived one night at a late
hour. I went to a good comfortable hotel—for they have such there—and
asked for a “single room.” The host regretted that he had no single
rooms unoccupied. Passengers from the earlier trains had taken them all.
He could put me in a double-bedded room where another guest had just
retired—one who appeared to be a “perfect gentleman:” that was the best
he could do. It was the best _I_ could do, too; so, I was shown to the
room.
I had a few hundred dollars in my pocket, and, not being perfectly sure
that the man in the other bed was a perfect angel, I thought there would
be no harm in placing it in the watch-fob of my unimpeachables, and
placing the same rolled up in a ball, under my neck. I did so. When
morning came, the “other fellow” got up first, and I felt somewhat
amused when I chanced to observe—for I was awake, and dreading to “turn
out” on account of the sharp morning air—that he had done so too. We had
both taken each other for rogues.
Well, that is the right way to view every stranger when you are
traveling. Look on every man you meet, and especially if he speaks to
you, as a deep-dyed villain, till you have had the most incontrovertible
proof that he is not.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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