“You will always be alone now, summer and winter, winter and summer,
your pillow the earth, harder and colder than my arms; only the song of
birds and the sound of rain in your ears.... And you will never see me
again, Jonah, never hold my young white beauty close to your breast,
never feel, as other men, love singing in your heart, and peace folding
down upon your eyes. You will be all alone, Jonah, with no one to tell
the secret things in your heart to at the set of sun, at the rise of
moon ... until at last, old and sleepy, you take my single kiss with
you into the darkness ... alone in the darkness too, Jonah ... alone in
the darkness....”
“O God,” cried Jonah, sobbing, “help me, help me.”
“God will not help you now,” said the woman.
The drowsy fragrance of her body spread through the night. “Come,” she
said, holding out her arms to him.
“God cannot help you now, my poor Jonah.”
Jonah took a step forward, and fell upon his knees. And then, one by
one far off and near, the demons of the desert broke into laughter,
wild peals of laughter, bitter and full of pain, cruel and without pity.
“Ha, ha, ha.”
“Alone, alone....”
“God cannot help you now.”
Under that mocking clamor, Jonah swayed like a reed, beaten to the
earth, his face hidden in his hands. And then, at last, when it seemed
to him as though he could bear no more, the terrible laughter stopped.
There was a cry, and then silence.
Jonah got up and looked around him. Nothing was to be seen; the woman
had vanished.
The little fox had run forward, and seized the demon by the leg. Once
again the desert was filled with a holy peace, as though brooding
beneath the wings of angels.
“One can at least always help oneself,” remarked the fox.
He lay down next to Jonah with a contented sigh. And presently the man
and the fox fell asleep together.
In her kitchen at home, Deborah sat praying for her son. She prayed
that God would be kind to him. “He is only a boy,” she said; “do not
ask him to behave like a man. Watch over him a little. I do not ask for
anything for myself. I am an old woman, and my heart was broken long
ago. But he is so young ... leave a little of his heart unbroken.”
She lifted up her eyes full of tears. “Leave me my son,” she said.
And Judith, at her window in Tyre, knelt with a pale and weary face,
peering out across the plains and hills of Phœnicia, across the wide
waters of Meram, far off and unseen, toward the desert, where the night
had already rolled up its cold blue clouds. And she, too, thought of
Jonah; she, too, saw in the moonlight, in the little garden, the thin,
worn face with its grave, dark eyes. They seemed to follow her, without
reproach, but with infinite tenderness, pitying and forgiving. And
suddenly she thought, “Yes, there in the desert there is peace; it is
gentle out there, where Jonah is. O my dear, my dear, do you forgive
me? Have you forgotten? It would have been different, Jonah, it would
have been so different....”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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