Humorous stories; Love stories; Pau (France) -- Fiction
With years of practice behind us, Jonah and I could thrust through
traffic, happy enough with an odd inch to spare. Naturally enough,
Berry had no such confidence. An inch was of no use to him. He must
have a good ell, and more also, before he would enter a gap. In the
trough of a narrow street he laboured heavily.... There was no doubt
about it. The towns through which we should have to pass on Wednesday
would settle our chances. My money was as good as gone.
It seemed equally probable that Berry would save his stake. Barring
accidents of the grosser sort, if we started betimes, we were bound to
reach Pau before ten. Such a protasis robbed the bet of its savour.
With a thousand francs at stake, it would be foolish not to take
reasonable care. And the taking of reasonable care would all but
eliminate the element of uncertainty.... There was no getting away
from it. Of the two wagers, only the first was worth winning. To
reach Pau before Jonah would be a veritable triumph.
Moodily I communicated my reflections to Adèle.
"I thought it was rather rash at the time," she replied. "But I think
there's a sporting chance."
"That's right," said Berry. "Put your money on uncle. With enough
encouragement I can do anything."
"Permit me to encourage you to blow your horn," said I. "That child in
front of you is too young to die." My brother-in-law obeyed. "All the
same, I'm afraid we're for it. It isn't so much a question of pace,
pure and simple, for Jonah's a careful driver. But his street work is
beautiful."
Berry sighed.
"I suppose he'd pass between those two waggons," he said sarcastically.
"He would," said I.
"I don't think you quite see where I mean," said Berry, pointing. "I
mean along that temporary passage, which would admit a small
perambulator."
As he spoke, Ping brushed past us, slipped between the two wains, and
disappeared.
Berry stared after it in silence. At length--
"I withdraw," he said. "I'm not a conjurer. If everybody stood well
back I used to be able to produce an egg, broken or unbroken according
to the temperature of my hands, from a handkerchief about six feet
square. People were very nice about it, very nice. But an inability
to introduce a quart into a pint pot has always been among my failings.
Don't say I've got to turn to the left here, because I can't bear it."
"No," said Adèle, smiling. "Straight on."
"What--past the steam roller? How very touching! Excuse me,
messieurs, but would you mind suspending your somewhat boisterous
_travail_? My little car is frightened.... No answer. I suppose I
must pass it. Or shall we turn back? You know, I didn't really half
see the cathedral!"
"Go on," I said mercilessly. "Jam your foot on the accelerator and
shut your eyes. Oh, and you might hold Nobby a minute, will you? I
want to light a cigarette."
Adèle began to shake with laughter.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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