Humorous stories; Love stories; Pau (France) -- Fiction
Contrary to my expectation, my brother-in-law, if unusually silent, was
driving well. But the road was against him. He had not sufficient
experience to be able to keep his foot steady upon the accelerator when
a high speed and a rude surface conspired to dislodge it--a shortcoming
which caused us all three much discomfort and lost a lot of mileage.
Then, again, I dared not let him drive too close to the side of the
road. Right at the edge the surface was well preserved, and I knew
that Jonah's off wheels would make good use of it. Such finesse,
however, was out of Berry's reach. We pelted along upon what remained
of the crown painfully.
Seventy-three miles separate Bordeaux from Angoulême, and at the end of
two hours fifty-four of them lay behind us. All things considered,
this was extremely good, and when Adèle suggested that we should eat
our lunch, I agreed quite cheerfully.
The suggestion, however, that I should feed Berry proved impracticable.
After four endeavours to introduce one end of a _petit pain_ into his
mouth--
"Would it be asking too much," said my brother-in-law, "if I suggested
that you should suspend this assault? I don't know what part of your
face you eat with, but I usually use my mouth. I admit it's a bit of a
rosebud, but that's no excuse for all these 'outers.' Yes, I know it's
a scream, but I was once told never to put _foie gras_ upon the nose or
cheeks. They say it draws the skin. Oh, and don't let's have any
comic nonsense about the beer," he added shortly. "Pour it straight
into my breast-pocket and have done with it. Then I can suck my
handkerchief."
As he spoke, Nobby leaned forward and took the dishevelled sandwich out
of my unready fingers.
"That's right," added Berry, with the laugh of a maniac. "Cast my
portion to the dogs." He dabbed his face with a handkerchief. "Never
mind. When his hour comes, you'll have to hold him out of the window.
I'm not going to stop every time he wants to be sick."
Eventually it was decided that, since we should have to stop for
petrol, Berry must seize that opportunity to devour some food.
"Besides," I concluded, "a rest of a quarter of an hour will do you
good."
As the words left my mouth, I noticed for the first time that my
brother-in-law was tiring.
For the moment I thought I was mistaken, for upon our previous runs he
had never turned a hair. Now, however, he seemed to be driving with an
effort. As if to confirm my suspicions, at the very next hill he
missed his change.
"I think," I said quickly, "you ought to have your lunch right away.
It's no good getting done in for want of food."
Berry shot me a pathetic glance.
"It isn't that, old chap. It's---- Hang it all, it's my shoulder!
That cursed muscular rheumatism cropped up again yesterday...."
The murder was out.
After a little he admitted that, ever since we had left Poitiers, any
quick movement of his left arm had caused him intense pain.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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