United States -- Social life and customs -- Fiction
Douglas listened with the whole of his mind. Judith's sobs had ceased
now, and she went on, slowly. "It's not that I'm against children. I'd
love to have a half a dozen babies. But what I am against is giving all
that is in me--the brain side of me, to something that demands only a
small part of my brain. I want a life like a man's and a woman's too,
that makes me give all, all. Surely I can find a place somewhere where I
can give that."
Douglas drew an uncertain breath. The Mormon woman had known. A sense of
his own inadequacy settled on him like a cloud.
"I know you think I'm a fool. Yet you have big dreams for yourself or
you wouldn't have felt as you have about the preacher. One has to have
an ideal to live by. I thought Inez had given me one and--" with a sob
that shook her whole fine body--"I don't see how it can work out!"
"I suppose," said Douglas, in his gentle voice, "that folks have been
trying out Inez' idea ever since love began, and the homely, every-day
details of living make it impossible."
Judith drew a long breath and was silent.
"And so," said Douglas, "you are through with love and marriage. Yet no
human being can be happy without both. Life is like that."
Judith sprang to her feet and Douglas rose with her. She began to walk
rapidly up and down before the fire. It was so evident that a tempest
was raging within her that Douglas watched her with astonishment and
dismay. The sunshine flickered gloriously through the cedar branches.
Wolf Cub gave cry after a coyote. It might have been a moment or a
lifetime to the young rider before Judith halted in front of him. Her
tear-stained face was tense. Her wide eyes burned with a light he never
before had seen in them.
"And if," she exclaimed, "I told you that I loved you; that for years I
had fought off a love for you that was like a burning flame in my heart;
if I told you that to me you are as beautiful as all the lovers in the
world; but that I never, never would give myself to you in marriage,
what would you say?"
Douglas' gloved hands clenched and unclenched, as he fought for self
control. After a moment he managed to return, steadily, "I'd ask you
why?"
The tensity of Judith's expression did not relax. "I've told you why. I
cannot bear to think of killing love by marriage. And it always works
so. Always. And yet, O Douglas, I love you, love you!"
Douglas threw back his head with a sudden breath, swept Judith into his
arms and kissed her, kissed her with all the ardor of years of
repression. Judith clung to him as if she could not let him go. And yet,
when he lifted his face from hers, she said, none the less firmly
because her voice was husky:
"But, Douglas, I won't marry you!"
Douglas lifted his chin. "Perhaps you won't, my dearest! I'm not going
to let that thought spoil the big moment of my life."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
Reviews
Reviews
No reviews yet
Be the first to share your thoughts on this work.
Elsewhere in the archive
Join the Discussion
Join the discussion
Sign in to leave a comment or review.
Sign InorCreate an account