Julia Ward Howe, 1819-1910Richards, Laura Elizabeth Howe
History
Julia Ward Howe, 1819-1910
Richards, Laura Elizabeth Howe
Authors, American -- 19th century -- Biography; Feminists -- United States -- Biography; Howe, Julia Ward, 1819-1910
"It is four weeks to-day since I saw your sweet face for the last time
on earth. It did not look like your little face, my dear pet, it was so
still, and sad, and quiet. But Death had changed it, and I had to
submit, and was thankful to have even so much of you as that still face,
for some days. Everybody grieved to part from you, dear little soul, but
I suppose that I grieved most of all, because you belonged most to me.
You were always with me, from the time you began to exist at all. The
time of your birth was a sad one. It was the time of the imprisonment
and death of John Brown, a very noble man, who should be in one of the
many mansions of which Christ tells us, and in which I hope, dear, that
you are nearer to Him than any of us can be....
"You arrived, I think, at three in the morning, very red in the face,
and making a great time about it. You were a fine large Baby, weighing
twelve pounds.... I have some of your baby dresses left, and shall hunt
them up and lay them with the clothes you have worn lately.... I gave
you milk myself.... I used to lay you across my breast when you cried,
and you liked this so well that you often insisted upon sleeping in that
position after you were grown quite large. It hurt me so much that I
finally managed to break you of the habit, but not until you were more
than a year old.... I had a nice crimson merino cloak made for you,
trimmed with velvet, and lined with white silk. I bought also a very
nice crochet cap, of white and crimson worsted, and in these you were
taken to drive with me....
"During this first year of your life I had some troubles, and your Baby
ways were my greatest comfort. I used to think: this Baby will grow up
to be a man, and will protect me when I am old. For I thought, dear,
that you should have outlived me many years. But you are removed from us
to grow in another world, of which I know nothing but what Christ has
told me....
"You used to keep me awake a good deal at night, and this sometimes made
me nervous and fretful, though I was usually very happy with you. I
would give a good deal for one of those bad nights now, though at the
time they were pretty hard upon me....
"... Your second summer brings me to the winter that followed. It was
quite a gay winter for us at old South Boston. Marie, the German cook,
made very nice dishes, and I had many people to dine, and one or two
pleasant evening parties. You still slept in my room, and when I was
going to a party in the evening, Annie[47] used to bring my nice dress
and my ornaments softly out of the room, that I might dress in the
nursery, and not disturb your slumbers. I was always glad to get home
and undress, and it was always sweet to come to the bed, and find you in
it, sound asleep, and lying right across.... I learned to sleep on a
very little bit of the bed, you wanted so much of it. This winter, I
bought you a pair of snow-boots, of which you were very proud....
[47] The child's faithful nurse.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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