And our talk that evening together--for Mrs. LeVallon put in no
appearance--was ordinary, too. Julius, of course, as ever, used phrases
that belonged to the world peculiarly his own, but he said nothing
startling in the sense I had expected. No dramatic announcement came.
He took things for granted in the way he always did, assuming my
beliefs and theories were his own, and that my scepticism was merely
due to the “mind” in me to-day. We had some supper together, a bowl of
bread and milk the man brought in, and we talked of the intervening
years as naturally as might be--but for this phraseology he favoured.
When the man said “good night,” Julius smiled kindly at him, and the
fellow made a gesture of delight as though the attention meant far more
to him than money. He reminded me again irresistibly, yet in no sense
comically, of a faithful and devoted animal. Julius had patted him! It
was delightful. An inarticulateness, as of the animal world, belonged
to him. His rare words came out with effort, almost with difficulty.
He looked his master straight in the eye, listened to orders with a
personal interest mere servants never have, and, without a trace of
servility in face or manner, hurried off gladly to fulfil them. The
distress in the eyes alone still puzzled me.
“You have a treasure there,” I said. “He seems devoted to you.”
“A young soul,” he said, “in a human body for the first time, still
with the innocence and simplicity of the recent animal stage about his
awakening self-consciousness. It is unmistakable....”
“What sleeps in the vegetable, dreams in the animal, wakes in the man,”
I said, remembering Leibnitz. “I’m glad we’ve left the earlier stages
behind us.” His explanation interested me. “But that expression in his
eyes,” I asked, “that look of searching, almost of anxiety?”
Julius replied thoughtfully. “My atmosphere acts upon him as a kind
of forcing-house, perhaps. He is dimly aware of knowledge that lies,
at present, too far beyond him--and yet he reaches out for it.
Instinctive, but not yet intuitional. The privilege brings terror.
Opportunities of growth so swift and concentrated involve bewilderment,
even pain.”
“Pain?” I queried, interested as of old.
“Development is nothing but a series of little deaths. The soul passes
so quickly to new stages.” He looked up searchingly into my face. “We
knew that privilege once,” he added significantly; “we, too, knew
special teaching.”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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