This was Sunday afternoon. The sun was warm. The lonely man was just
pushing off his boat on the lagoon. It sat deep in the water, half full
of sand. Somers and Harriet lay on the sand-bank. Strange it was. And it
_had_ a sort of fascination. Freedom! That’s what they always say. “You
feel free in Australia.” And so you do. There is a great relief in the
atmosphere, a relief from tension, from pressure. An absence of control
or will or form. The sky is open above you, and the air is open around
you. Not the old closing-in of Europe.
But what then? The _vacancy_ of this freedom is almost terrifying. In
the openness and the freedom this new chaos, this litter of bungalows
and tin cans scattered for miles and miles, this Englishness all
crumbled out into formlessness and chaos. Even the heart of Sydney
itself--an imitation of London and New York, without any core or pith of
meaning. Business going on full speed: but only because it is the other
end of English and American business.
The absence of any inner meaning: and at the same time the great sense
of vacant spaces. The sense of irresponsible freedom. The sense of
do-as-you-please liberty. And all utterly uninteresting. What is more
hopelessly uninteresting than accomplished liberty? Great swarming,
teeming Sydney flowing out into these myriads of bungalows, like shallow
waters spreading, undyked. And what then? Nothing. No inner life, no
high command, no interest in anything, finally.
Somers turned over and shut his eyes. New countries were more
problematic than old ones. One loved the sense of release from old
pressure and old tight control, from the old world of water-tight
compartments. This was Sunday afternoon, but with none of the surfeited
dreariness of English Sunday afternoons. It was still a raw loose world.
All Sydney would be out by the sea or in the bush, a roving, unbroken
world. They all rushed from where they were to somewhere else, on
holidays. And to-morrow they’d all be working away, with just as little
meaning, working without any meaning, playing without any meaning; and
yet quite strenuous at it all. It was just dazing. Even the rush for
money had no real pip in it. They really cared very little for the power
that money can give. And except for the sense of power, that had no real
significance here. When all is said and done, even money is not much
good where there is no genuine culture. Money is a means to rising to a
higher, subtler, fuller state of consciousness, or nothing. And when you
flatly don’t want a fuller consciousness, what good is your money to
you? Just to chuck about and gamble with. Even money is a European
invention--European and American. It has no real magic in Australia.
Poor Richard Lovat wearied himself to death struggling with the problem
of himself, and calling it Australia. There was no actual need for him
to struggle with Australia: he must have done it in the hedonistic
sense, to please himself. But it wore him to rags.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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