Kenelm Chillingly — CompleteLytton, Edward Bulwer Lytton, Baron
General
Kenelm Chillingly — Complete
Lytton, Edward Bulwer Lytton, Baron
English fiction -- 19th century
I expect to be absent a year or eighteen months; if I prolong my travels
it shall be in the way you proposed. I will then take my place in polite
society, call upon you to pay all expenses, and fib on my own account
to any extent required by that world of fiction which is peopled by
illusions and governed by shams.
Heaven bless you, my dear Father, and be quite sure that if I get into
any trouble requiring a friend, it is to you I shall turn. As yet I have
no other friend on earth, and with prudence and good luck I may escape
the infliction of any other friend.
Yours ever affectionately,
KENELM.
P. S.--Dear Father, I open my letter in your library to say again “Bless
you,” and to tell you how fondly I kissed your old beaver gloves, which
I found on the table.
When Sir Peter came to that postscript he took off his spectacles and
wiped them: they were very moist.
Then he fell into a profound meditation. Sir Peter was, as I have said,
a learned man; he was also in some things a sensible man, and he had a
strong sympathy with the humorous side of his son’s crotchety character.
What was to be said to Lady Chillingly? That matron was quite guiltless
of any crime which should deprive her of a husband’s confidence in
a matter relating to her only son. She was a virtuous matron; morals
irreproachable, manners dignified, and _she-baronety_. Any one seeing
her for the first time would intuitively say, “Your ladyship.” Was
this a matron to be suppressed in any well-ordered domestic circle? Sir
Peter’s conscience loudly answered, “No;” but when, putting conscience
into his pocket, he regarded the question at issue as a man of the
world, Sir Peter felt that to communicate the contents of his son’s
letter to Lady Chillingly would be the foolishest thing he could
possibly do. Did she know that Kenelm had absconded with the family
dignity invested in his very name, no marital authority short of such
abuses of power as constitute the offence of cruelty in a wife’s
action for divorce from social board and nuptial bed could prevent Lady
Chillingly from summoning all the grooms, sending them in all directions
with strict orders to bring back the runaway dead or alive; the walls
would be placarded with hand-bills, “Strayed from his home,” etc.; the
police would be telegraphing private instructions from town to town;
the scandal would stick to Kenelm Chillingly for life, accompanied with
vague hints of criminal propensities and insane hallucinations; he would
be ever afterwards pointed out as “THE MAN WHO HAD DISAPPEARED.” And to
disappear and to turn up again, instead of being murdered, is the most
hateful thing a man can do: all the newspapers bark at him, “Tray,
Blanche, Sweetheart, and all;” strict explanations of the unseemly fact
of his safe existence are demanded in the name of public decorum, and no
explanations are accepted; it is life saved, character lost.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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