Ladies and GentlemenCobb, Irvin S. (Irvin Shrewsbury)
General
Ladies and Gentlemen
Cobb, Irvin S. (Irvin Shrewsbury)
Fiction; Short stories, American
"She's doing what she's been doing every chance she got these last
four-five days, that's what." Mr. Gatling was manifesting an attitude
somewhat common in husbands and fathers when dealing with their
domestic problems. He preferably would flank the subject rather than
bore straight at it, hoping by these round-about tactics to obtain
confirmation for his suspicions before he ever voiced them. "Got eyes
in your head, haven't you? All right then, use 'em."
"Hector Gatling, for a sane man, you do get the queerest notions in
your brain sometimes! What on earth possesses you? Hasn't the child a
perfect right to stroll down there and watch those three guides packing
up? You know she's been trying to learn to make that pearl knot or
turquoise knot or whatever it is they call it. What possible harm can
there be in her learning how to tie a pearl knot?"
"Diamond hitch, diamond hitch," he corrected her testily. "Not pearls,
but diamonds; not knots, but hitches! You'd better try to remember it,
too--diamonds and hitches usually figure in the thing that I've got on
my mind. And, if you'll be so kind as to observe her closely, you'll
see that it isn't those three guides she's so interested in. It's one
guide out of the three. And it's getting serious, or I'm all wrong. Now
then, do you get my drift, or must I make plans and specifications?"
"Oh!" The exclamation was freighted with shock and with sorrow but with
incredulity too.
"Oh!" said Mrs. Gatling again and now she was fluttering her feathers
in alarm, if a middle-aged lady dressed in tweed knickerbockers and a
Boy Scout's shirt may be said to have any feathers to flutter. "Oh,
Hector, you don't mean it! You can't mean it! A child who's traveled
and seen the world! A child who's had every advantage that wealth
and social position and all could give her! A child who's a member
of the Junior League! A child who's--who-- Hector, you're crazy.
Hector, you know it's utterly impossible--utterly! It's preposterous!"
Womanlike, she debated against a growing private dread. Then, still
being womanlike, she pressed the opposing side for proof to destroy
her counter-argument: "Hector, you've seen something--you've overheard
something. Tell me this minute what it was you overheard!"
"I've overheard nothing. Think I'm going snooping around eavesdropping
and spying on Shirley? I've never done any of that on her yet and I'm
too old to begin now--and too fat. But I've seen a-plenty."
"Oh, pshaw! I guess if there'd been anything afoot I'd have seen it
myself first, what with my mother's intuition and all! Oh, pshaw!" But
Mrs. Gatling's derisive rejoinder lacked conviction.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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