Ladies and GentlemenCobb, Irvin S. (Irvin Shrewsbury)
General
Ladies and Gentlemen
Cobb, Irvin S. (Irvin Shrewsbury)
Fiction; Short stories, American
"It wasn't the minister, stupid! It was another man. At that the
minister--I mean the Reverend Mr. Peters, not the other one--glared at
me today as though he were thinking unutterable things. I thought then
he might be miffed because I'd been to see the other minister first. He
behaved so--so stand-offish and sort of hostile when I told him about
our plan for having a joint Christmas tree for both Sunday Schools. But
since I talked with Anna I'm pretty sure it must have been my clothes
he didn't like. I'm afraid some of these people are going to be rather
difficult, really I am!"
"I'm going to be a trifle difficult myself unless those cigars get
here soon," said Mr. Bugbee. "Say, they seem to be having unusually
long and silent nights up here this winter, don't they?" he added. "I
never thought I'd become so city-broke that I'd miss the plaintive
call of the taxicab mooing for its first-born. Gee--it's nearly nine
o'clock. If the lights in this house aren't turned out pretty soon
some unacquainted passers-by--if any such there be--will suspect the
presence of burglars on the premises."
* * * * *
It was on Friday afternoon of that week that a female villager called.
She had a keen and searching gaze--that was the first thing to be
noticed when the door had been opened in response to her knock. And the
second striking thing about her was that on taking a seat she seemed to
sink into herself sectionally rather in the style of certain nautical
instruments.
The collapsible-looking lady stayed on for upwards of an hour. Upon
leaving, she uncoupled joint by joint, as it were, becoming again a
person of above the average height. Mr. Bugbee, who after a mumbled
introduction and a swift appraisal of the visitor had betaken himself
to another part of the house, reentered the living-room upon her
departure.
"Who," he asked, "who is yon gentle stranger with the telescopic eye
and the self-folding figure? I failed to catch the name."
"Miss Teasdale--a Miss Henny Teasdale."
"Did you say Henny--or do my ears deceive me?"
"Yes; it's short for Henrietta, I think."
"And long for Hen. I'll think that, if you don't mind. If I'm not
too inquisitive, might I make so bold as to inquire what brought her
hither?"
"She came to tell me some--well, some things. She said she felt it to
be her Christian duty to walk up here and tell me these things."
"For example, what?"
"For one thing she thinks we make a mistake in----" Mrs. Bugbee, who
appeared slightly flustered, left this sentence uncompleted and built a
second one of fresh materials: "Clem, why is it that people have to be
so narrow and so critical of other people's motives and so everything?"
"I give it up. But to return to the lady whose fighting name is Henny?"
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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