Lady Patricia: A comedy in three acts — John Shaqi
Lady Patricia: A comedy in three actsBesier, Rudolf
General
Lady Patricia: A comedy in three acts
Besier, Rudolf
English drama (Comedy)
Yes, ’um. And if I was, fac’s won’t change for the wishin’. Thirteen’s
the number, and thirteen it’s like to remain, seeing as Mrs. Baldwin’s
turned sixty-three.
LADY PATRICIA.
I’m afraid I don’t quite understand what you’re talking about.
BALDWIN.
I——
LADY PATRICIA.
You needn’t repeat it.... Oh, I remember now why I sent for you, Baldwin.
I wonder if, without hurting the beauty of the tree, you could open a
window to the sunset?
BALDWIN.
Open a winder?...
LADY PATRICIA.
You don’t understand me? Let me put it differently! I should like you to
cut away some of the foliage so that I can watch the sun dropping behind
the hills.
BALDWIN.
Yes, m’lady. But——
LADY PATRICIA.
I know what you are going to say. When we built this place in the tree,
I gave you special directions not to touch the western foliage as it hid
the view of Ashurst Manor, which I found distressingly unsightly. Yes!
But since my aunt, Mrs. O’Farrel, has taken the house, it seems to me far
less offensive. Likes and dislikes are, after all, so much a matter of
temperament and association! The former owner was an impossible person.
BALDWIN.
The Scotch gentleman?
LADY PATRICIA.
He was a Jew, Baldwin, though his name was Mackintosh. I don’t wish to
speak of him. When you cut the foliage, please use restraint and feeling.
On no account disfigure the tree. Watch from this spot the sun going
down, and lop away a little branch here and a little branch there, so as
to give me some perfect glimpses of gold and rose.
(_ELLIS enters with cup and saucer, milk, cream, whisky,
soda, and a tumbler._)
BALDWIN.
Yes, ’m.
LADY PATRICIA.
(_To ELLIS._) What have you got there?
ELLIS.
The cup and saucer and the milk and cream, my lady. And I thought I had
better bring whisky and soda as well, my lady.
LADY PATRICIA.
I never told you to. I wish you wouldn’t be so enterprising. Please hide
it with the cream in the summer-house. (_ELLIS does so._) So you think I
can safely trust you with this important piece of work, Baldwin?
BALDWIN.
Yes, ’m.
(_ELLIS goes out._)
LADY PATRICIA.
Do it as soon as possible, as I shall often be sitting here during these
adorable summer evenings—
(_BILL O’FARREL enters during the rest of her sentence.
He is a wholesome, typically English young man of about
twenty-six._)
—and I couldn’t bear to miss many sunsets like yesterday’s.
BILL.
Patricia!
LADY PATRICIA.
(_Without rising._) Bill!
BILL.
(_Seizing her hands._) Patricia!
LADY PATRICIA.
Bill!... That will do, Baldwin.
BILL.
Quite well, Baldwin?
BALDWIN.
Pretty middlin’, Mr. O’Farrel, sir, thank you.... Then it don’t matter
showin’ up Ashurst Manor, m’lady?
BILL.
(_With a laugh, to PATRICIA._) Hullo! what’s this?
LADY PATRICIA.
No, no, Baldwin! I wish to see it. It has suddenly grown beautiful! A
fairy palace!
BILL.
Great Scott!
BALDWIN.
Yes, ’m. But——
LADY PATRICIA.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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