Legends: Autobiographical SketchesStrindberg, August
General
Legends: Autobiographical Sketches
Strindberg, August
Dramatists, Swedish -- 19th century -- Biography; Strindberg, August, 1849-1912
I feel greatly embarrassed in narrating my friend's adventure, but I
have begged his pardon beforehand, and he knows how unselfish my aims
are. Besides, as he has related his troubles to everyone who would
listen to them, without having deposed to the facts under a seal of
secrecy, I have only to play the rôle of an impartial chronicler,
and if I am looked at askance on account of that it is I who pay the
penalty.
My friend is an atheist and materialist, but enjoys the life which he
despises, and fears death, which he does not know. At the beginning
of our acquaintanceship, when he offered me a refuge in his house,
he treated me with friendly brotherliness, and tended me like a
sick person, that is to say, with the considerate sympathy of an
intelligent free-thinker who understands mental disorders, and the
indulgent treatment which they require.
But even a freethinker may have his dark hours of depression, the cause
of which he knows not. Late one evening, when the room was in twilight,
and the lamps, though kindled, did not illuminate the corners where the
shadows fell, my friend confided to me, in answer to my expressions of
gratitude, that the obligation lay on his side. For he had, he said,
a short while ago lost his best friend by death. Since then he was
troubled by uneasy dreams, in which there always mixed the image of his
departed friend.
"You also?" I exclaimed.
"I also! But you understand that I am only speaking of dreams such as
one has at night."
"Yes, certainly."
"Sleeplessness, nightmares, and so forth. You know what it is to be
ridden by a nightmare, which is a disorder of the chest caused by
disturbed digestion following on excesses. Have you never had it?"
"Yes, indeed. One eats crabs for supper, and then one has it! Have you
tried sulphonal for it?"
"Yes. But as to trusting doctors--you know yourself already, perhaps?"
"I should think so! I know them thoroughly. But let us speak of your
dead friend. Does he appear to you in a disturbing way,--I mean in
dreams?"
"I need hardly tell you it isn't he who appears before me. It is his
corpse, and I am sorry to say he died under strange circumstances. Only
think! A young talented man who had made a very promising début in
literature must die of an obscure disease, tuberculosis miliaris, which
caused his body to so decompose that it looked like a heap of millet."
"And now his body appears to you?"
"You don't understand what I mean. Let us drop the subject."
* * * * *
With his health shaken and his moods as varying as April weather, my
friend seems to suffer from an acute degree of nervousness. When I part
from him in February, he will never go alone to his house after sunset.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
Reviews
Reviews
No reviews yet
Be the first to share your thoughts on this work.
Join the Discussion
Join the discussion
Sign in to leave a comment or review.
Sign InorCreate an account